You're Not Quite Yourself Today
by RachelDalloway
Summary: Roswell, New Mexico. July 1927. Everything was fine until that strange flash of light in the sky. Suddenly things are not as they should be. One of them is desperate to fix it. The other one...not so much. And Rose is caught in the middle.
1. Chapter 1

AN: The "incident" in Roswell, New Mexico didn't happen until 1947, but for the purposes of this story we're going to all pretend _something_ happened there much earlier. I realize this is kind of an odd idea, but I was watching The X-Files episode "Dreamland" and I started to wonder how that situation would work with two other people.

_July 1927_

_Roswell, New Mexico_

Rose peered up at the starless sky. "Are you sure you saw something?"

"Yeah, I'm sure." Jack searched the inky blackness above them. "I don't know what it was, but I saw it."

"Well, I don't see anything."

"It's gone now. There was this flash of light and then nothing."

"That sounds like a shooting star," she said, giving him a skeptical look.

"That's not what this was—Hey, look there it is again!" He pointed at the sky.

"I still don't see it."

"C'mon, it's moving!" Jack cried. He started running, chasing something only he could see. _There isn't anything up there_, Rose thought. She followed him anyway.

_Some Distance Away_

Cal stared up at the sky. _So much for being able to see the stars in the country_, he thought bitterly. He'd been wandering around the desert for over an hour and had yet to see anything. He raised the bottle of tequila he was carrying to his mouth and turned it up. It was empty. _When did that happen?_ Annoyed, he tossed it into the night and continued walking. He was just about to turn back and find his way home when out of the corner of his eye he saw a flash of light.

"What the hell was that?" he asked no-one in particular. He peered up at the sky, eyes wide, hoping to see it again. A moment later he was rewarded. "There it is again!" A streak of light was moving across the sky. Excited—though he couldn't have explained why unless the tequila had had something to do with it, "Finest money could buy," his bootlegger had called it—he started running. He hadn't gone very far when the streak exploded with an eardrum shattering crack.

_Meanwhile…_

"Did you hear that?" Jack exclaimed.

"Hear what?"

"Are you saying you didn't hear that?"

Rose just looked at him. "Are you feeling okay? Sure you weren't in the sun too much today?"

"I'm fine," he insisted. "I guess I imagined it. I must be tired." He put an arm around her. "Let's just go back."

Sometime before dawn the sleeping position of two men's bodies changed. Jack's body, which was curled around Rose, rolled onto his stomach. His face buried in his pillow, he slept the rest of the night slightly resembling a starfish. Across town Cal's body moved out of its usual starfish position and curled around the nearest pillow.


	2. Chapter 2

_Jack_

Without opening his eyes Jack could tell something was different. There was something missing. He reached out and felt the empty space next to him. _That's weird._ He couldn't be sure without looking, but it felt like that side of the bed was made up. "Rose?" He opened his eyes. He'd been right. The other side of the bed didn't look as though anyone had slept there. He was too puzzled by her absence to notice he was in a strange bed. In a strange room.

"Who is she?"

His head whipped around, searching for the voice. He came face to face with an attractive blonde woman. Her mouth was thin and angry. Her arms were crossed in front of her chest. "Well?" she said shrilly. "Who is she?"

"Who is who?" _Who the hell are you?_

"The woman you're looking for. She's one of _them_ isn't she?" A horrified look crossed her face. "You brought her here didn't you? And she left you—that's why you're trying to find her!"

There were a lot of things he wanted to say, questions he wanted to ask, but when he opened his mouth all that came out was, "What?"

The woman threw up her hands in disgust. "You know, it is one thing for you to have these affairs of yours, for you to wander around all night and stumble back in drunk out of your mind and sleep in here by yourself, but it is quite another for you to bring one of these women into this house! Where your _children_ are! You can do what you want when you're alone, but don't even _think_ you can let it come anywhere near me or them because I will not have that kind of humiliation," she said in one breath, her voice a fierce whisper. She marched from the room, stopping in the doorway to throw a glance over her shoulder. "And get out of bed, would you? We're due at the Bells at 11."

Jack didn't even know where to begin trying to understand what had just happened. He sat up and wished he hadn't as pain blossomed in his head. _She did say something about drinking. _"Yeah, but I haven't been…though it would sure go a long way toward making this situation less bizarre."

_I'm not sure there's much that can do that. Look around wouldja? _

He slowly scanned the room. He had never seen it before in his life. The money that had gone into decorating it was obvious. On the floor next to the bed was a pair of what appeared to be expensive black shoes. "So, where the hell am I?" For the first time since he woke up he began to panic. "And where's Rose?"

_Oh now you want to panic?_

"There has to be some sort of mistake. This is not right. I do not belong here," he said, trying to remain calm. "I must be wrong about the drinking. We must have done _some_thing last night, and now I don't remember what. I have just been mistaken for someone else because somehow I ended up in the wrong place. Rose must be around here somewhere, and when I find her she will know what happened and this will all make sense."

_Feel convinced? Because I know I do. And your voice sounds a little odd to me. What do you think?_

Ignoring his inner voice, Jack swung his legs over the side of the bed, determined to get up and face the situation. The sooner he got up, the sooner he would be laughing about the whole thing. He glanced down at the legs hanging off the bed. "Those aren't my pants." _Yeah, maybe you also changed into someone else's pants last night. It could happen. _"There is a perfectly rational explanation." He stood up and walked across the room. Discovering the door on the other wall led into a bathroom, he stepped inside and turned on the light.

And found himself staring into a mirror.

"Well, that explains why I don't recognize the pants."

_Cal_

He too could sense something was different without opening his eyes. _Is there someone…with me?_ Years of sleeping alone had made him conscious of the slightest movement or change in weight ratio. _I don't remember meeting anyone. Did I get so drunk I actually slept with my wife? Well, if you did you'd better hope she's not awake so you can still get out now. She'll start expecting this sort of thing all the time. _He shuddered and opened his eyes.

_That was….not what I expected. _There was indeed someone with him, but it wasn't his wife. Her back was to him, and all he could see were bright red curls. _I thought I got over the redhead obsession…_He was too engrossed in his confusion over finding a strange—and oddly familiar—woman sleeping next to him to notice he was not in his own bed.

He jumped up, startled out of his thoughts. She was starting to move. _This is going to be so awkward. _

Rose rubbed her eyes and reached behind her. "Jack where are you?" she asked sleepily.

"What?" He answered before he realized what he was doing. _That is not my voice. Wait, is it? What does my voice even sound like? Have I ever listened to it before?_ Just as he was about to get hopelessly lost in his own head, Rose rolled over.

She gave him a puzzled look. "Is something wrong?"

_Well, I woke up next to _you. _As much as I always wanted to sleep with you I'm too confused about how this happened to even remember it. _But what he said was, "What? Oh—um, no."

Unconvinced, she sat up and moved toward him. "Your eyes don't look right. Let me feel your head."

_She is naked. _"What?"

Rose pressed her wrist against his forehead. "You feel fine." She moved her hand to his cheek for a moment before climbing over him and out of the bed. He watched her disappear into another room.

_Okay. So you're in bed with her. And she's naked. She's walking around in front of you naked. And she looks really, really good doing it….Stop! You have to figure out how you got here. The last time you saw her she was far less happy to see you._ "So, um, what did we do last night?" he called.

She stepped out of what he assumed was a bathroom, a toothbrush in her hand. "What?"

"Last night. What exactly happened?"

"Don't you remember?"

"Uh, well, no."

"Jack, are you sure you feel okay? Because there's no reason why you shouldn't remember last night."

_Wait. What did she just call you? _"What did you call me?'

She stared at him, her brow knit in confusion. "Your name," she said slowly. "The name you've had for about 35 years now."

_I just wish I were still 35. _"Oh. My name. Right."

Rose gave him another puzzled look before she went back into the bathroom. Panicking, Cal leapt from the bed. "There has to be a reason why she called me that twice already," he murmured to himself.

_Because she thinks that's your name. _

"That doesn't make any sense."

_And what does? Your theory that you ran into her at some point last night and she got naked with you? Willingly? With _you?

Suddenly Cal felt an overwhelming urge to find a mirror. Hearing the sound of the shower start, he hurried into the bathroom.

_That is…well, it makes the name thing make a lot more sense. _


	3. Chapter 3

_Jack_

It took a few seconds for the shock to wear off, and when it did all Jack felt was an overwhelming urge to panic. His first instinct was to scream and run from the room—run all the way outside and keep running until the world made sense again. Until he found Rose.

_Yeah, I don't think she'd be that happy to see you._

"I've been married to her for 15 years. We have five children together. She's my best friend."

_But you're forgetting—she's all of that to _you_, not him. And right now, as far as everyone else is concerned _you _are _him.

A cold realization settled over Jack's mind. "Then he's…"

He was saved from further thought by the return of what he could only assume was his—_Cal's—_wife. "Are you just going to stand there all day?" she snapped.

_I'm dealing with something, okay? _"Oh, no," he said. "I was just—" He searched for something to say. "—Going to shower."

"Well do it quickly then."

With no alternative course of action—the screaming and running away plan having been abandoned—Jack did the only thing he could do. He showered. It was the first time had had ever showered without looking at anything other than the wall in front of him.

He was drying off when curiosity—_You are a sick man—_got the better of him. He looked down. "Hhm…some people would say that explains a lot.."

_Cal_

He stared at his reflection. _That's not my reflection. That's _his_ reflection. I'm just looking at it for some reason. _He touched the blonde hair that fell over his forehead. "This is not happening."

The water clicked off. Rose peered around the edge of the shower curtain. "Would you hand me that towel?" she asked, pointing to a shelf behind him. Robotically he retrieved the towel in question and handed it to her. "Thanks." His mouth dropped open as she stepped out of the tub a moment later, her body wrapped in what had to be the smallest towel ever made.

"Why are you staring like that?"

"What?"

"You're staring at me."

"I am?"

"Yes, you are," she said, studying his face. "You look as though you've never seen me before."

_That wouldn't be entirely inaccurate._


	4. Chapter 4

AN: Hey all, I hope some of you are enjoying this story. As always, reviews are greatly appreciated-and thanks to those who have so far. I know Nutella didn't exist then, but body switching doesn't exist at all-at least not to my knowledge-so please forgive me for having them eat it. It just seemed like something J and R would eat. A quick thing about all the naked guys staring at themselves: I'm not a guy, but for some reason it seemed like the thing they would both do. Something about the whole former rival thing.

_Jack_

He discovered, much to his relief, the closet in the bedroom was full of men's clothing. "Guess he sleeps here a lot then." He quickly dressed himself, trying not to focus on whose clothes he was putting on. There was still a part of him that was hoping it was all a dream, and any second now he was going to wake up. But he decided it was best to play along until that happened. Cal's wife was not a pleasant woman—_Not entirely surprising. She is married to _him_ after all—_and he didn't want to make the situation any worse by incurring her wrath any further.

When he reached the bottom of the stairs he realized he had absolutely no idea where to go. No idea where anything was. No idea who anyone was except for the wife whose name he had yet to catch. Jack was just about to give up and return to the Running Away Plan when salvation showed itself in the form of a housemaid.

"Sir?' A pretty young woman eyed him, concern in her soft brown eyes. "Are you alright?"

"I-I'm fine," he said, sounding much less sure of himself than he had intended. _Get it together. He is not a nervous type of guy. People are going to notice this. _"Would you tell me where everyone is?"

"Having brunch in the dining room, sir. It's Sunday, you know."

"Right. I knew that." He started to walk past her. "Where exactly is that?"

If she thought he was crazy she hid it well. "It's the room at the end of that hall on your left." Jack looked at the hallway she was indicating. "Ah..yes..thanks." He hurried away. _Best just be quiet. Don't speak unless you have to. _

As she watched him go the maid shook her head. "He's drank himself out of his mind."

All too soon Jack found himself at the end of the hallway, staring at a set of heavy double doors. He could hear people talking in low voices on the other side. _Can't just stand here all day..._he thought as he pushed them open.

_Cal_

_Okay, think. What would he say? _"I'm sorry. I just...you're so beautiful." He flashed her what he hoped was a winning smile. He must have gotten it right because although she rolled her eyes she returned the smile. He watched as she crossed the bedroom and opened a drawer in the bureau next to the bed. She reached inside and grabbed a white pair of underwear and matching bra. Feeling his eyes on her she looked over her shoulder. "You're still staring."

"Oh..um..." _I'm sorry. It's just that you think I'm your husband. But I'm not. I'm actually your ex-fiancee_ _and somehow I ended up in the body of the man you left me for. _He closed his mouth. There was really nothing he could say.

While he was trying to work out a reply that didn't qualify him for a one-way ticket into a mental institution Rose had slipped into the bra and underwear and was busily searching through the closet. "You know," she called without turning around, "how very much I appreciate naked you, but I'm not sure I can eat breakfast with you unless you at least put on some pants."

He'd been so caught up in the shock of waking up in the wrong body-and in _Jack's_ body no less-Cal hadn't even noticed he wasn't wearing any clothes. "I was just about to do that," he lied. He stepped over to the bureau and opened the top drawer. _Please be the right one_. It was. He grabbed the first pair of shorts he saw and began to step into them. As he did so, he felt an overwhelming urge to look down.

_What is wrong with me?_

But he looked anyway.

_Impressive Dawson, impressive. _

_Jack_

He was seated at the head of a table that seemed much too large for the amount of people it held. Cal's wife was seated at the opposite end. Her mouth had softened, but her eyes were flinty. On his left was a young boy. Jack guessed he was about 10 or 11. He had light brown hair and dark blue eyes. Jack couldn't help but notice the way he avoided looking in his direction. On his right was a young girl. She looked about 8 or 9. She had long black hair and light brown eyes. She too avoided looking in his direction.

_His children must not like him any more than his wife does, _Jack thought as he began to eat the food that seemed to magically appear on his plate. It was actually the work of a highly skilled serving girl. As she resumed her post against the wall Jack's friendly nature took over and he smiled at her. She shrank from his gaze, a slightly frightened look in her eyes.

_Don't forget who you are-who they think you are. He would never, ever smile at the girl who serves him food. _Annoyed with himself for making such a stupid mistake he stared at his food and concentrated on finishing it as quickly as possible. Although he was eating what he was certain had to be the "best" food money could buy he might as well have been eating sawdust for all the pleasure it brought him. As he lifted each forkful of exotic fruit to his mouth, all he could think of was Rose. He pictured her sitting at the small table in the kitchen of the house they had rented for the summer, the paper spread out in front of her. She would be delicately holding a piece of bread, careful not to get any of the Nutella she spread so thickly on each slice on her fingers. And he would be-_Except you're not. You're here. And _he's_ there. With her. Pretending to be you. _

_She'll know it isn't me,_ he told himself. _The second he opens his mouth she'll know it isn't me, and she'll..._

_What?_

Jack felt sick. He didn't have an answer.


	5. Chapter 5

AN: Thanks for the reviews! I'm trying to allow them have changed a bit over the years, you know as people tend to do, but still stay true to their original selves.

_Cal_

He was eating the most delicious thing he had ever tasted. He didn't know what it was, but he wished he'd discovered it sooner.

Rose had dressed quickly, and was finished brushing her hair—which was much shorter now, the curls coming only to the middle of her neck—by the time he had found a pair of pants. "I think you really were out in the sun too much yesterday," she'd said, placing a hand on his face and gazing into his eyes. Cal was shocked by the level of concern he saw etched in her features. No-one had ever looked at him that way before. "Oh, I don't know what I'm looking for," she'd said with a nervous laugh. She turned and moved toward the door. "I'll see you downstairs," she said over her shoulder before disappearing into the hallway.

His cheek felt warm where her hand had been. He couldn't remember when he'd ever been touched like that. "She touched _me_ like that," he said, awestruck. _Um, reality check, no she didn't. She touched _him_ like that. She only touches _him_ like that. If you didn't look like him the response would be very different. _"Can't I enjoy anything?" he'd muttered before reaching into the closet to find a shirt. As he slipped it on he took a look at himself in the mirror. He'd forgotten Jack was taller than he was. _And skinny. I could have snapped him like a twig if I'd had the chance._ Except that wasn't exactly true anymore. In the 15 years since he'd last seen him Jack had grown beyond his boyish slimness and developed all sorts of interesting new attributes.

Cal scowled at the image staring back at him, cursing the rippling chest muscles and the well defined arms. "He was supposed to stay weak," he said as he buttoned the shirt. He hadn't seen Jack in almost two decades yet the moment the shock of waking up in his body wore off all the old hatred came rushing back. He didn't bother trying to do anything with Jack's hair. "He wouldn't," he reasoned as he gave himself one last go-over in the mirror. It wasn't great, but it was the best he could do.

He'd found the kitchen easily enough. There was a medium-sized room at the bottom of the stairs and the kitchen was through a door at the other end of the room. The scene he found was exactly as Jack pictured it. Rose looked up from the newspaper spread in front of her when he came in. "I see you made it okay," she said smiling. He hesitantly returned the smile and sat down across from her.

There was already a plate and a cup of coffee waiting for him. He sipped the coffee, surprised by how good it was, and eyed the food on the plate suspiciously. It was two thick slices of wheat bread with something spread on them. He glanced over at Rose to see what she was eating. She had the same thing, and she was munching happily. _Well, I am hungry,_ he thought as he gingerly picked up a slice and took a bite.

"This is amazing," he said, his mouth full. "How did you do this?'

"Thank you. It is quite a culinary feat to open a jar of Nutella and spread it on some bread. I'm glad you appreciate my efforts," she said, her lips curling upwards at the edges.

He looked at her, puzzled. _Oh...that's what this is, whatever that is. And he would know that. And now she's playing a game with him. What would he say? _Cal tried to remember the way Jack spoke. He had joked a lot at that dinner he'd come to. He'd been charming and witty—_and an all-around pain in the ass._ "I do," he said, swallowing the bite. "You are quite skilled."

He must have gotten it right because she took a sip of her coffee and said, "Are you still planning to get some work done today?"

"Work? Uh, yeah," he said. "If I can." _If I figure out what the hell he does for work I can. Or maybe I'll find a way to get back to my own body. Whichever comes first. _

"You won't have me to blame if you can't," she joked. "I'll be gone until at least the middle of the afternoon."

"You will be?" He was surprised by how much he didn't want her to leave. _That reluctance to see her go wouldn't have anything to do with what he could get her to do, would it?_

"Don't you remember? I have that meeting about the summer class I'm teaching. The only time Diana could do it was today, which is just absurd since it starts tomorrow, but what can I do?"

Cal felt a strange thrill at the way her voice lilted on the word "absurd." For a split second he saw her not as she was but as she had been. _She was so beautiful_. But as he looked at her he began to notice that rather than diminishing with age her beauty had only increased. When he'd known her she had been just a blossom, and now she was a fully blooming rose. "I guess nothing," he said quickly.

"I'd be more annoyed if I weren't so excited about this class," she said. "Though there is a part of me that's afraid it'll be nothing but bored, over privileged women who won't take any of it seriously, I can't help but hope there'll be just one who really _cares_, Who—who reminds me of myself," she finished, unable to fully articulate what she wanted to say.

He just stared at her, dumbfounded by everything she'd just said. _She's teaching? What could _she_ teach? _He had conveniently forgotten all the intellectual interests he had once all but forbidden her to pursue. _And what does she mean, "reminds me of myself"?_

Fortunately he never had to answer her last statement. "I'll be late if I don't get out of here now," she exclaimed, glancing at her watch. On her way out the door she gave him a quick—but tender—kiss. "Paint something beautiful while I'm gone," she said, brushing his hair back from his face. "I love you."

"I—I love you too," he called after her. The words felt strange in his mouth.

_Jack_

He bolted out of his chair the moment the meal ended. He didn't care how crazy he looked. He had to get out of there. He had to find Rose. He had to tell her—_Tell her what? _He was almost to the front door when he realized he didn't know what. "Tell her the truth," he murmured to himself. "That's all I can do."

_So you're planning to go running up to her raving about how you woke up in the wrong body this morning, and tell her the man she thinks is her husband and the love of her life—the man she thinks is you—is in fact not him. He is actually you or who you appear to be, and that just happens to be a man she hates. A man who once tried to kill the both of you. Yeah, good luck with that. _

"Oh shit."

The magnitude of what was happening finally began to sink in. It didn't matter if he did manage to find her—or get to her, more like since he wasn't even sure they were in the same city anymore—because there wasn't anything he could say to her. There was no way to make his story sound any less crazy than it was. There was no way to explain how it had happened. _And,_ Jack thought as a whole new level of panic descended upon him, _you have absolutely no idea how to change it back. _

"Where are you going?" a haughty female voice demanded from behind him.

_The wife. Again. _"Just stepping out for a bit of air," he said, trying to imitate the way Cal spoke. _Sounding like an arrogant bastard is harder than he made it seem. _

She pursued her lips. "Well, be back by 10:30 then, and do try not to run into any _friends_ while you're gone, especially ones named after flowers." And with a curt toss of her head, she swept by him.

For a moment all Jack could do was stand there, baffled by the harshness of Cal's wife's treatment of him. _Something must have really changed about him if he's letting someone—a woman, no less—talk to him like that. _Picturing Cal, a broken and possibly deeply unhappy man, made Jack think of a painting he had once seen. It was of a king who had once been feared and who had all but ruled the world, but the painting had shown him after he lost everything. His power all gone he had stared from the canvas, his eyes wide and lost, as if begging someone to remember who he had once been. At the time Jack had been struck by the sadness of the painting, and as he thought about how similar Cal's situation seemed—at least so far—he was struck by the sadness that probably hung over every day of his life. "I wonder if he was ever truly happy," he mused.

_Why do you give a damn? Sure, you're an extremely empathetic and kind person, but this guy? You're standing here wasting time wondering if this guy_ _has a good life? Seriously? The man who had you dragged away from Rose and handcuffed to a pipe and left to drown?_

"Yeah…fuck that," he said. "Just this once."

And then it hit him. "Now's my chance." He threw open the front door and stepped outside. He didn't know what he would say to Rose, and he didn't care. When he saw her the words would come to him just like they always did. He would take her in his arms, look deep into her eyes, and she would just know. 

At least, that's what he hoped would happen.


	6. Chapter 6

AN: I thought about writing Jack and Rose's children into this, but as the story unfolded in my head—particularly the Cal half—I realized it would just create too many secondary characters and complicate the dynamic I want to set up between Cal and Rose. There is an explanation for why the children aren't there, and it'll come out in a later chapter. Oh, and as far as I know the painting Jack thinks about in the previous chapter exists only in my imagination, though there could something like that out there somewhere. And kudos to anyone who catches the slight _Pride and Prejudice _reference in this chapter.

_Cal_

Once she was gone he found himself sitting in an empty house with no idea what to do next. Unlike Jack, who couldn't stop thinking about getting back home, he had yet to care if he ever did. Returning to his own body would be nice, but he was nowhere near panicking. He drummed his fingers on the table but found the noise was grating to his ears after the peaceful silence that had settled following Rose's departure. _Well…you could explore._ Now there was an idea. _I can see just how they've been living all this time. _

He hurried into the other room, stopping in the center so he could see everything just by turning his body. "It's not that bad," he was forced to admit after he had given the room an once-over. It was nothing compared to what he had, but it was by no means the hovel he'd always pictured them in. The furniture was clean and well-cared for even if it was a bit out of date. The wallpaper was new. The books on the small shelf near the fireplace were a mixture of new and old. The old ones looked as though they had been carefully selected by a devoted collector. On the mantel were a series of photographs. The first was of Jack and Rose on a beach, the water washing over their bare feet. Hands tightly clasped, they looked blissfully into the camera. Rose's hair was still long and flowed freely. A crown of orchids rested on top of her curls. Looking closer he could see where someone had penciled a date in the corner: _April 30__th__, 1912. _

As his eyes moved down the row he saw one in which they stood in front of the Eifel Tower, but they were gazing at each other instead of the camera this time, their hands clasped. "Do they ever stop touching?" he muttered, a hint of jealousy in his voice. He and Vanessa had never gone through that "Can't keep their hands off each other phase", and it annoyed him to see that Jack and Rose had apparently never left it. The date on that one read _August 11__th__, 1921. _Jack was missing from the next photograph. It was of Rose. She was holding a small baby in her arms, her attention obviously devoted to it. In the corner someone had written: _February 22, 1914 Rose and Nicholas. _The next one was of three of them—Jack, Rose, and a slightly older version of their son.

It seemed like they added yet another child with each new photograph, and by the time Cal had come to the end of the row he had counted five children in all. Three seemed to have been born within five years, judging from the dates in the corners, and then there was a gap of another four years between those three and what he guessed was a set of opposite-sex twins. In total they had three daughters and two sons. The last photograph was of the seven of them. It had been taken on a beach. The date read _June 9, 1926._

"They have _five_ children," he said incredulously. "She was willing to have _five_ children?" It occurred to him that perhaps she hadn't had a choice, but he dismissed the thought immediately. The evidence in the photographs was too strong. Rose had wanted her children—all five of them. And so had Jack. They all looked so _happy_ together. Even in a still, two-dimensional image the love between them was obvious. It was unfathomable to him. He thought of his own children. There were only two—that he legally acknowledged—and yet he had never imagined feeling for them what Jack and Rose clearly felt for their children and they had almost three times as many. Nor could he imagine ever spending very much time with them. What would be the point? Children weren't particularly interesting—except to women sometimes—so he felt little need to have contact with them. When they grew into properly behaving young people, he would of course acknowledge this, but his aside from making sure they had everything their name required, his duty as a father was pretty much over as far as he was concerned.

"They don't talk to me anyway. The boy cowers whenever I come into the room." The boy, Fitzwilliam. In a rare burst of affection—Or was it gin? He couldn't remember anymore, but preferred to think it had been affection—Cal had let his wife name their only son. Though once she announced her choice, he'd wished he hadn't. The irony of his son having a slightly ridiculous and somewhat pompous-sounding name and the fact that he himself had a slightly ridiculous and somewhat pompous-sounding name escaped him completely. And the girl—Evangeline—wasn't any better. He couldn't remember if he had ever even heard her speak. He told himself that it mattered less with her than it did with the boy. Her development had absolutely nothing to do with him. It was the boy he was supposed to eventually mould.

_Oh of course they're happy. They don't know any better, _he thought as he turned away from the mantel and started back up the stairs. The only problem was, he didn't quite believe it.

_Jack_

He hurried down the street, searching for a sign or a landmark that would tell him where he was. When he stopped at a corner to wait for the light to change he found himself standing next to a young boy selling newspapers. He reached into his pocket. It was empty. _There's an irony for you._ "Could I just take a look at one of those?" he asked. The boy eyed him suspiciously for a moment, but his nice clothes must have convinced him he was trustworthy—or intimidated him. "Sure," he said, handing him a paper.

Jack quickly scanned the front page. _Roswell, New Mexico. _"So I'm not as far away from her as I thought," he murmured. He was about to hand the paper back when his eyes fell on a small headline at the bottom of the page. "Strange Lights Over Desert." _Other people must have seen it too._ He didn't know why, but somehow he knew those lights had something to do with his situation. He read the brief article, making a mental note of the names mentioned. He needed to find out more about these lights. "Thanks," he said, handing the paper back to the boy.

He had gone a few blocks when out of the corner of his eye he saw a flash of red. She was heading in the opposite direction and on the other side of the street, staring straight ahead, clearly in a hurry. _Where's she—oh right._ It was the 7th. She had that meeting on the 7th. Jack didn't give himself time to think about what he was doing. She was too close to let her slip away. He began to run, dodging the other pedestrians as best he could. When he saw a break in traffic he threw himself into the street.


	7. Chapter 7

AN: Sorry about my love of cliffhangers! During the first 9 years of my life I got a daily dose of soap operas, and I'm afraid I now have a tendency to write for the cliffhanger. But thanks for reviewing you guys! I was afraid this story would be just too weird for people to like.

_Jack_

Horns were screeching. People were swearing at him. Tires were squealing. He didn't hear any of it. If he slowed down for even a second she would slip away. "Rose!" he screamed as his foot landed on the sidewalk. He weaved through the crowd as best he could. "Rose!" Finally the sound of his voice reached her ears. She stopped and turned around. She looked puzzled at first, but then a flash of recognition crossed her face. Recognition gave way to shock. Shock slid into fear. And fear finally evolved into repulsion. The whole process took just long enough for him to catch up to her.

"Rose," he said again, breathlessly this time. Too caught up in his joy at seeing her again he forgot his outward appearance and did the worst thing he could have done. He reached out and touched her.

Her face twisted. She jerked her arm away. "What—what do—" She tried to speak but was too overcome by anger.

"Rose, please," he begged. "Please just listen to me for one second. I know—"

"Listen to you? To _you?_" Jack winced as she spat the words at him. "Oh, I think we've said everything we need to say to each other." She turned on her heel and began to walk away. "Rose, please, don't go!" he yelled desperately. "It's not what you think! _I'm_ not what you think!" But his words fell on deaf ears.

_Cal_

Upstairs he found a second bedroom and bathroom. The bedroom was empty save for blank canvases and paintings, some completed and some not. "I forgot that's what he does," Cal said as he eyed them. He was annoyed by how good they were. Rose's words echoed in his head. So that's how he was expected to spend his day. Well, it sounded a lot better than going to…to whatever it was Vanessa was insisting they go to.

He picked up a charcoal pencil that lay on the small table next to the door. "I've got his body, maybe…"

Fifteen minutes and a frustration headache later Cal gave up. He may have had Jack's body, but he didn't have an ounce of Jack's talent.

_Jack_

He couldn't remember walking back to the house. Or getting into the car a little while later and arriving at wherever he was now. If he tried he could vaguely recall Cal's wife ordering him to do something with his hair, but he didn't know if he had or not. All around him people were mingling politely, sipping drinks, and pretending not to see his body slumped in a chair next to the wall. He noticed nothing. He had been in a thick daze since his encounter with Rose.

He couldn't get over the look in her eye—the anger, the hatred, the disgust, and underneath it all, the fear. He knew she hadn't been looking at him. She had been looking at Cal. But his irrational, emotional half was winning out over his rational half. _She has no idea something's wrong. She thinks he's me. _The thought made his stomach twist. How could she not know? He couldn't be that good of a liar.

_Everyone you've seen today thinks you're him, so why shouldn't she think he's you?_

_That's different. She _knows_ me. We have a kind bond Cal and his wife—and everyone else in his family—have clearly never had. _

_But they only spent breakfast together. If he stayed calm and just went along and pretended to be you there's a chance she if she did notice something was off there wasn't enough time for it to really sink in. And besides, do you want her panicked? _

"No, I don't."

_And think about this, what if he hadn't played along? What if he'd woken up and freaked out? _Jack's blood ran cold as he considered what could have happened. Judging from the way his wife treated him it didn't look as though he resembled the man who had once terrorized them, but that didn't mean that man couldn't return. _I have to get her away from him, but how?_

And what if he did manage to keep her fooled? What if he was able to pick up enough details from whatever she said and what he remembered of them to allow him to play the part well enough that Rose wouldn't get so suspicious she started asking questions and rethinking her encounter with "Cal"?

Jack lost the ability to breathe as a new possibility entered his mind. _If she thinks he's me…_He dug his fingers into the arms of the chair as images of Rose and "himself" began flashing through his mind—kissing her, undressing her, touching her.

"I've got to get to her again. I have to make her listen to me." He looked around for a way out.


	8. Chapter 8

_Cal_

He was just about to go back downstairs when he noticed a small bookshelf against the wall next to the door. He had missed it when he first came in because when the door was open it was hidden. It only held three books. Intrigued, he bent down and picked up the first one in the stack. He didn't notice the title. He was too busy staring at the author's name.

_Rose Dawson._

He grabbed the other two books. They each said the same thing. He lowered himself onto the floor. "When did she—how did she—" He looked down at the books in his hands, sure that he had misread. But there it was in black and white. Her name. Just seeing the name itself was disconcerting enough, but to see it as the author of a book was almost too much. He hadn't thought of her in years, but the occasional times he had it had never occurred to him that her name would have changed. There was a part of him that didn't believe Jack would ever marry her, and an even bigger part of him that hoped he wouldn't. That part hoped his original prediction had been true, that she would end up as nothing but a whore to a gutter rat.

"But that didn't happen, did it?" he said bitterly. "Everything worked out perfectly for them, and what happened to me?"

_Jack_

There it was, across the room, the door that led to the hallway that led outside. It seemed like it had taken a lifetime to find. Jack slowly stood up from his chair and began making his way across the room. He kept his head down and tried to draw as little attention to himself as possible. It seemed to work, but his as his hand was about to turn the doorknob it happened.

"Cal!" a female voice called excitedly.

Jack froze. _This is not happening. Okay, maybe it is happening, but that doesn't mean I have to acknowledge it. _He turned the knob and opened the door. He was just stepping through it when he felt a hand on his shoulder. _Goddamnit. _He had no choice but to turn around.

He found himself staring into the face of a pretty young woman. She had warm blue eyes and chestnut hair. "Where are you going?" she asked.

"Uh…I was just going to get some air. I haven't been feeling well today." _Would he admit to an illness? Oh who cares. _

Her forehead wrinkled in concern. "What's wrong?"

Jack sensed her concern was more than friendly. There was something about the look in her eyes. Or maybe it was the way she pressed her hand against his arm. _How many women does he have? _"It's nothing really," he said quickly. He took a step backwards. She took a step forward. "Well, if you're not feeling well you shouldn't be alone."

"I think maybe I should be…if it is something serious I wouldn't want you to catch it..." He took a few quick steps back.

She took a few steps forward. "Oh, you must let me come with you. I insist."

For the first time in his life Jack wished he were the type of man who disrespected women.


	9. Chapter 9

_Cal_

"Have you just been sitting like that since I left?" He looked up, startled by the sound of Rose's voice. She stood in the doorway, a puzzled expression on her face but a smile in her eyes. He realized he was still holding the first book he'd picked up, and he had apparently read 200 pages. _When did that happen?_ The last thing he remembered was flipping it open, just to see what it was like, to assure himself that she hadn't actually produced anything of merit, and now here he was two-thirds of the way through it with Rose standing over him. It had sucked him in. He hated to admit it, but it had. He had always had a weakness for crisp dialogue and dry humor and there was no shortage of either in Rose's book.

"Were you reading?" she asked, sitting down on the floor in front of him.

"Yeah…I was," he said. "I just sat down and lost track of time."

"What is it?"

"It's—" _You can't say it's her book. He's probably already read her books. It'll look weird…yeah, but sitting around reading something she wrote is just the kind of thing he'd do. He keeps a stash of them up here for Christ's sake. _"Yours," he said finally. "I was reading your book."

"You were? Why? Which one?" She leaned over and lifted the book so she could read the cover. "You picked my first one? That's the worst out of all of them. I had no idea what I was doing then."

_If you didn't know how to write when you wrote this one I can't even imagine what the other two are like. _"Yes, you did. It's brilliant." He was surprised by the amount of sincerity in his—Jack's—voice. Thinking it was one thing, but telling her was quite another.

Her face slowly broke into a smile. "You say that about everything I do." She took the book from his hands and flipped it open to the page just before the title page. "It's still true," she said, tracing her fingertips over the words. He leaned forward and read: _To my shooting star. I don't even want to think about where I'd be without you._

"Did I really do that much for you?" he asked, stunned by what he'd just read. _"I don't even want to think about where I'd be without you." What the hell does that mean? She would have been married to me without him, living like a queen. What is so wrong with that? _

_Are _you _happy?_

It was a question he had always refused to allow himself to consider. Of course he was happy. He had everything any man could ever dream of—and then some.

_Are you sure?_

Rose didn't answer. She set the book aside, took his face in her hands, and kissed him. It was unlike any kiss Cal had ever experienced before. _She loves him. She really, truly loves him. _He had never understood it until then.

_Jack_

"Look," he said, "I don't want to be rude, but there's something I have to do. And I have to do it alone. Thank you for offering to come with me, but really I can't—"

"Who is she?"

"What?"

"Don't play dumb with me. I'm not your wife. Who's the woman you're so desperate to get to?"

_Well, actually it _is _my wife. _He sighed. "I'm sorry. I can't explain. I'm not trying to hurt you. I'm just not myself today. Please understand that."

She watched him go, her eyes narrowed. "Not this time."

Once he was outside he realized he had no idea what he was going to do. He'd already tried talking to her. _And look how well that went._ So what else was there to do? Try again? He checked his watch. "She's probably home by now…I could…" But even as he said it he knew he couldn't. He knew how it would go. Seeing him—and twice in one day no less—would just upset Rose. _And he'll be there. _He could just see it. Rose clutching "Jack", hurling daggers at "Cal" with her eyes. She'd never hear a word he said. And there he'd be, holding her, smirking over the top of her head. _"I always win Jack."_

No, he couldn't let that happen. It would just push her even further away. Somehow he would have to get her to trust him, to believe him. Short of finding a way to reverse whatever had happened to them that was all he could do. With a sign of frustration he turned and began to walk back to Cal's house. It was the last place he wanted to be, but he had nowhere else to go.


	10. Chapter 10

_Cal_

His realization left him paralyzed. He had no idea what to do. He couldn't even bring himself to kiss her back at first. _She'll know it isn't him,_ one part of his mind insisted. The other half disagreed. _She'll definitely know it isn't him if you just sit there not doing anything. And besides, doesn't everyone pretty much kiss the same? _He decided to go with that conclusion despite the fact that he wasn't entirely sure he believed it. In the end he didn't care if she got suspicious or not. _After all, what is she going to say? Did you switch bodies with my husband, and if so, where is he really? I'm the one who did the switiching and I still can't quite believe it. _He'd wondered what it would be like to kiss her for so long it didn't matter that it wasn't him she was kissing.

An eternity later-or so it seemed to Cal-the kiss ended. He could barely breathe as Rose silently studied his face before pulling herself to her feet. _What is she thinking? _Despite how much he hadn't cared whether or not she noticed anything different during the kiss once it was over he found he couldn't think about anything else. Suddenly it was absolutely vital that she not get suspicious. It didn't matter that there was nothing she could do and no way she could prove or explain what had happened. If she got suspicious or scared things would change, and that was the last thing he wanted. Suddenly, after years of chasing one woman after another-and losing all interest the moment they batted their eyelashes and were impressed into silence by his bank statement-and buying up everything in sight in the vain hope that it would fill the void in his life, he finally found the one thing that could fill the void.

True love.

The fact that he wasn't the beloved was just something he would have to figure out a way to overcome.

_Jack_

The house was a still as a tomb when he enterd. _Where is everyone?_ He wandered through the first floor, baffled by how completely untouched and unlived in everything seemed. It was so different from his own home where nothing stayed untouched for long and silence was an impossible dream. Walking through Cal's house Jack was struck yet again by just how easy it was for someone to have so much and yet so little. He felt what could only be described as a cold hand squeezing his heart. _This is where Rose could have ended up. _

"I'm sorry. I didn't know you were coming in here."

Jack had been so lost in his thoughts he hadn't noticed walking into a lavishly decorated sitting room-_Or is it a library?_There were book shelves lining the walls, but like everything else in the house none of them appeared to have ever been touched, let alone read. He stared at the young boy in front of him. He appeared to be trying to vanish into the wall.

"It's fine," Jack said pleasantly. It was obvious from the fearful look in the boy's eyes that he had chosen a tone of voice Cal had never used with him, and though he knew it was a risky move he just couldn't bring himself to be unkind to him. "You can be in here even if I am."

The boy eyed him anxiously. "Are you sure?"

Jack nodded. "Quite." He almost smiled but decided that just might be more kindness than the child could handle at one time. He watched as Cal's son sat down in a chair near the fireplace, the fearful look never leaving his eyes. _He's not staying because he wants to, _Jack realized. _He's staying because he's too afraid not to. _Suddenly his mind was filled with thoughts of his own children. None of them had ever looked at him like that. _They never had a reason to. _His stomach twisted. _What if I never see them again?_


	11. Chapter 11

_Jack_

He lay in bed staring at the ceiling. He'd been lying there for hours, his mind racing, trying to understand what was happening. None of it seemed real.

He'd quickly discovered that talking to Cal's son was impossible. No matter what he said the boy's replies were always politely monosyllabic. They'd sat awkwardly together for an hour, and all Jack knew for sure about him was what he'd known the first moment he saw him. He was desperately frightened of Cal, who from the looks of things, saved that anger he wasn't unleashing on his wife for him. Finally Jack hadn't been able to take it anymore. "You can go if you want to," he said. Relief washed over the boy. "Thank you sir," he said as he hurried from the room.

Jack dropped his head into his hands. _That man should have never had children. _He couldn't help but think again of his own, scattered for the summer. Nicholas was staying with his best friend's family. Anna was staying with Rose's mother. Natalie was at camp. And the twins-Clarissa and Peter-were at a retreat for artistically gifted children. Splitting everyone up had seemed like a good idea at the time. The children all had something they wanted to do, and he and Rose hadn't had time alone in years. _We should have never come here. This is my fault. If I hadn't decided I wanted to paint the desert then Rose would have never found that teaching job and we would have stayed home and-_

"So you're alive," Vanessa-he'd finally learned her name-said from the doorway. "For a while there I wasn't sure." There was no trace of concern in her voice.

"I had to leave," Jack said flatly.

"Yes, I gathered that when I realized you were gone." She walked over to a small bar on the other side of the room and poured herself a drink. "Your friend the flower need you?" Her voice was a perfect specimen of contempt.

Jack pushed back the anger that rose in his throat. _She has a right to sound that way. She's his wife, and she thinks he's having affairs. Which he is. _"No. I just needed to go."

She gave him a look that made obvious what she thought about his needs before gulping down the last of her drink and leaving the room.

The rest of the day passed by in a a miserable blur. He might never have moved from his chair if one of the maids hadn't leaned down and nervously told him when it was time for dinner. As with brunch the family ate in tense silence. Vanessa glared at him across the table, and Cal's daughter didn't look at anything but her plate. But there was something different about his son. Had Jack been less caught up in his own misery he would have noticed that every so often he would look up from his plate and watch him eat. The looks only lasted for a moment or two at a time, but it was something he had never done before.

Jack didn't taste his food. He didn't care if he ate at all, but his hands picked up the fork and fed him anyway.

And now here he was, lying in Cal's bed. He hadn't slept without Rose in his arms in 15 years. _Rose. _He twisted the sheets in his fingers. What was she doing? Had she started to notice he wasn't acting like himself? Had she said something? Had he-_Don't go there. _

_But what if-_

_No. He isn't stupid. He knows better than to have a fit about what's happened. He knows no-one will believe him. _

_That doesn't mean he wouldn't hurt her. _

Jack squeezed his eyes shut and gritted his teeth. "Stop thinking like that. There's nothing you can do either way. She doesn't trust you at all. Besides, he's probably so thrilled to find himself alone with her he's doing everything he can to keep it going." A moment later the full meaning of his words hit him. "Oh God no...Rose please know _something_ is wrong, please don't let him..."

_Cal_

If the rest of Jack's day had resembled some sort of torture exercise, the rest of his day yhad resembled happiness incarnate. "What's wrong?" he'd asked after Rose stood up. "Nothing," she'd said, offering him her hand. "It's nothing."

"Okay." He took her hand. It was clear she had noticed something wasn't quite normal, but she had no way to explain what it was. He doubted if she was even sure what it was.

"I'm hungry," she'd said as they made their way downstairs. "Feel like having a late lunch with me, or would you prefer if we called it an early dinner?"

"Either sounds perfect," he'd said happily. And he really had been happy. The next few hours were some of the happiest and most frightening of his entire life. He and Rose cooked together. He was pleasantly surprised to discover it really was as easy as he'd always thought it was. She'd told him about her day, and her story had actually held his interest. She was as good at telling stories verbally as she was at writing them down. _Where was this side of her when we were engaged? _he wondered. _Why did I never see this?_ _Why did she only show _him_? _Cal had conveniently forgotten that when he'd been engaged to Rose his favorite thing about her had had nothing to do with her mind.

"Here, tell me how this tastes." She held a spoon up to his mouth.

"It's delicious."

Her face broke into a smile. "I was hoping you'd like it."

"You were?"

"Well, yes, I made it just for you."

"Why would you do that?" he asked, touched by the gesture. _You know she made it for him and not you, right?_

"Because I love you," she said laying a hand on his cheek. "And the other day you were telling me about your mother used to make this for you and how much you missed it. I just wanted to try and give a tiny piece of your childhood back to you."

_She isn't talking you to. She doesn't give a damn about you. _"Thank you," he said quietly. He'd meant it. So what if it was Jack she loved? As far as she-and everyone else was concerned-he _was_ Jack. And he liked it that way.

He passed the rest of the night in a blissful haze. He couldn't remember what he and Rose talked about, but he knew he let her do most of the talking. Fear of saying the wrong thing and giving himself away combined with a desire to hear what she had to say kept him quiet. _I actually want to hear her speak_, he'd thought. _I've never wanted to hear any woman speak before. Why didn't she talk like this back then?_ he wondered, once again he was conveniently forgetting his own role in their ill-fated relationship.

He didn't think it could possibly get any better until they climbed into bed together. She laid her head on his chest and wrapped her arms around him. "Mmm..." She breathed in the scent of his skin. "This is how it's supposed to be." He cradled her body in his arms. "You don't know how much I agree with you." _You obviously don't know how much she isn't talking to you. Don't you get that you're not the man she married? You're not the man she loves?_

_I could be. _

_You're not._

_So?_

_What the hell do you mean "So"? How long do you really think you can keep this up? What happens when she asks you to draw something?_

He closed his eyes and buried his face in her curls. _I'll find a way to deal with that when it happens. _


	12. Chapter 12

_Jack_

Eventually his body triumphed over his mind and he fell into a restless sleep. When he woke up the next morning the only part of him that felt refreshed was his determination. It didn't matter how crazy his story sounded or how long it took him to convince Rose to trust him. _I won't let him steal everything I've built for myself—my marriage, my family, my _life. He decided the best thing to do would be to try and find out more about the lights he'd seen. He was sure they were connected somehow. He bolted out of bed with an energy he didn't know he had. "I'm not letting this go on forever."

_Cal_

_I hope this goes on forever. _He was lying in bed watching Rose get ready for her first class. He was enjoying the way even a drop-waisted dress hugged her body, the green silk clinging in all the right places. All too soon—in his mind, at least—she turned to him and asked, "Do I look alright?"

"You look beautiful."

Her face broke into a smile. "Do I really?" She looked down at herself. "I never know if I can trust you. You always say that. Even when I was pregnant with the twins and—" She made a large circle with her arms. "—was like this you said that."

_Did you hear that? Hear that mention of children that _aren't _yours? Children she would have rather died than have with you? _ Rose brought out many of Cal's qualities, but rationality and clearheadedness were not among them. _She thinks she did. _"Because you were." _Sure about that? You weren't there, remember? _

_Shut up._

_Jack_

He was surprised to discover a stash of money in Cal's sock drawer. "That's not nearly as impressive as a personal safe." He stared at it for a moment, unsure of what to do. _Take it. You might need it. _"I don't want his money." _That doesn't mean you won't need it. _He snatched a roll of bills and stuffed them in his pocket. "Fine."

He skipped breakfast. The thought of facing Cal's silent family across an oversized table was just more than he could bear. As he slipped outside he breathed a sigh of relief. No-one had seen him, and if he was lucky it would be awhile before anyone noticed he was gone. Vanessa hadn't come up once to yell at him, so there was a chance that meant he didn't eat with them on Mondays. Not wanting to test fate Jack wasted no time in hailing a taxi.

"Where to sir?"

Thoughts of Rose threatened to overtake his mind, but he pushed them away. _Have to stay focused. _"The _Roswell Times_ office."

He needed to find out about the lights and the man who wrote the article seemed like the best person to talk to first.


	13. Chapter 13

AN: I couldn't resist the slight crossover.

_Jack_

"Why are you so interested in this?" The question came from Sebastian Loomis, the reporter who had written the article about the lights. He leaned forward, his elbows resting on his desk. "I'm sorry if that sounded rude. It's just not the sort of thing I expected someone like you to be asking about."

Jack shifted in his chair. _Someone like me. _Suddenly all his old class issues were back in full force. _What does that mean? _"Well, astronomy is an interest of mine, and I happened to see the lights," he heard himself explain. "I couldn't help but be intrigued by them."

"Fair enough." Sebastian leaned back. "I hope you weren't offended by the 'someone like you.' I didn't mean that the way it sounded. It's just that you're not the first person to ask me about this, and the other man who was in here was…well, a bit odd."

"Do you know who he was?" Jack asked quickly, sure that he knew without being told.

"I only know his name. It was rather unusual—much like he was. I didn't catch the name of the woman with him. She didn't speak much, she—"

Jack's heart skipped a beat. "She didn't happen to have red hair, did she?"

Sebastian looked surprised. "How did you know?"

"Lucky guess." _He brought her with him? Does that mean she knows? Did he tell her? Did she guess? _ He was too busy trying to answer those—and the countless other—questions to notice Sebastian reaching into his middle desk drawer. He pulled out a small business card and held it out for Jack to take. "He left this."

Robotically Jack reached out and took the card. In small, neat letters it read: _Fox Mulder. Investigations into the UnXplained. _Beneath that was a phone number and address. _It wasn't him? If it wasn't him, does that mean Rose is investigating things herself? _"Thanks for your time," he said, standing up to leave. "This Mulder didn't happen to say where he was staying, did he?"

_Cal_

While Jack was doing his best to get to the bottom of the mess that had become his life, Cal was doing his best to forget he had ever had any other life. After Rose left he ate a leisurely breakfast, relishing the freedom to eat whatever he chose, however he chose, before rummaging around in Jack's half of the closet. He finally found some clothes that satisfied his taste and set about dressing himself. As he did so, he couldn't help but stare at his reflection in the mirror.

Cal had always thought of himself as an attractive man—more than attractive, really—and he had always taken great pains to insure he always looked his best. His was the sort of attractiveness that can only flourish if nurtured by hand-tailored suits, diamond cufflinks, and endless tins of hair pomade. He lacked the ability to adapt to his surroundings as easily as Jack did—Jack, who could capture the attention of every woman in the room whether he was wearing an expensive tuxedo or a shirt so thin it looks about to unravel and a pair of pants he'd put on three days before. The unruly locks that would have looked ridiculous on Cal only made Jack all the more appealing. It was one of the reasons Cal had hated him so much. But now, examining his reflection, he found himself pleased by it. Jack had the kind of attractiveness that didn't need maintaining.

"And I could get very used to that."

_Jack_

"How did you get my name, Mr—?"

Jack winced. "Hockley. I got it from a Sebastian Loomis. He's the reporter you talked to."

Mulder nodded. "So what can I do for you?"

Jack was seated at a small table in Mulder's motel room. Mulder was standing near the window. He would glance out every few seconds, as if watching for something. The glances were starting to make Jack nervous. _This guy _is_ odd. _ Just then the door opened and in walked a woman. With red hair.


	14. Chapter 14

AN: I am so sorry for throwing in some characters from a whole other thing and not taking the time to explain. If you've seen _The X-Files_ then you probably get it, but if you haven't, you may be confused. Mulder and Scully are F.B.I. agents who investigate the unexplained and mysterious—usually involving government conspiracies and aliens. They're also a bit of a "couple" in an unspoken kind of way. When I was trying to decide how to have Jack go about investigating what happened, I decided to use them because an episode where the same thing happens to Mulder was the inspiration for this story. The F.B.I. didn't exist then, so I'm just having them be independent investigators. And any explanations for the lights, whether they sound scientific or otherwise, are purely the product of my imagination. Thank you for reading all of this.

_Jack_

_Rose!_

But it wasn't.

"Scully," Mulder said happily, the window suddenly forgotten.

_Is that a name?_ Jack wondered. He studied the woman, who was just standing there, arms crossed over her chest. She had short red hair and fair skin. The hair and the skin tone were the only things that she and Rose had in common. The woman Mulder identified as Scully wore a no-nonsense expression and projected an air of seriousness. She wore a neat, tailored suit and no jewelry.

"Why are we still here Mulder?" she asked impatiently, not noticing Jack.

"What do you mean? We're investigating the—"

"Yes, the mysterious lights in the desert, and we now have a perfectly rational explanation so can we just go home?"

"Um, what is the explanation?" Jack asked nervously. There was something about this woman that made him feel very intimidated. She whipped her head around, shocked by the sound of his voice. "Who're you?"

"Forgive my partner," Mulder said. "Mr. Hockley this is Dana Scully. Scully, this is Mr. Hockley he came to ask me about those lights."

"I hate to disappoint you if you were expecting something exciting, but after speaking with the area's experts, I have to conclude the lights were the product of a cluster of shooting stars. Nothing more, nothing less."

Mulder rolled his eyes. "You really think anyone on the payroll of Smoking Man is gonna tell us the truth, Scully?"

Scully tensed. "Mulder, I know what you think this is, but you are wrong. Nothing happened here but some pretty lights in the sky. No body switchings—"

Jack couldn't believe his ears. "Did you just say body switchings?"

Scully sighed. "You haven't been listening to him have you?"

"Well, actually—" Jack hesitated. Could he really tell two perfect strangers? _They seem to know about this stuff..somehow._ "I woke up yesterday in the wrong body."

_Cal_

He wandered around the house, suddenly fascinated by everything. He examined the photographs on the mantel again and found himself wondering what each child's name was. The fact that he was thinking about another man's children was something he chose not to address. _No-one but me knows that._

It didn't take him long to re-explore the entire house. He was hoping to find out more about Jack and Rose's life, but as he stood once again in their bedroom, he was forced to admit defeat. He knew just as much about them after looking through their stuff a second time as he had 15 years before, or so it seemed. He was an artist. She adored him. End of story. He was about to go downstairs again when something caught his eye. There was a box he'd overlooked on the shelf in the closet. He grabbed it and sat down on the bed. "Hope it isn't locked."

It wasn't.

Inside he found more even more photographs, a leather portfolio, and a bank book. True to form, it was the bank book he investigated first. "Huh…did not expect that…" Not only was Jack supposed to remain weak—or Cal's definition of weak—but he was supposed to remain $10 away from penniless as well. Even as he was enjoying the life Jack had built Cal couldn't help but resent it. Who was he to have success and happiness? He didn't deserve it. "He stole the woman he married," Cal said bitterly.

_Jack_

"See Scully!" Mulder was all but jumping up and down with glee. "I told you something happened here!"

Scully ignored him and addressed Jack. "You do realize what you just said, don't you?"

Jack nodded. "I do. I also realize how it sounds." He took a deep breath. "But it's true." And he proceeded to tell them the whole story. When he was finished Mulder looked feverish with excitement, and Scully's skepticism was obvious. "Look, I don't care if you don't believe me, but do you know of a way to reverse this? I don't think I can live like this another day. I can't keep pretending to be someone else—especially not someone I know is off with my wife pretending to be me, someone who would probably be quite happy to stay me forever." It was a possibility Jack had been trying to avoid thinking about.

Mulder was the first to speak. "We might know of a way to help you."

"Really?"

"Mulder—" Scully began, but he cut her off. "It can't hurt to tell the man, Scully. Just because you don't want to believe doesn't mean it isn't real." She sighed. "Fine." Mulder turned to Jack. "Well, in each of the other cases like this we've investigated the lights came back four days after they first appeared. Now, in each case the people didn't get switched back, but the ones who went back to where they had been when they first saw the lights did."

"So you're saying this happened just because we both happened to be looking at the sky at the same time?"

"Could be. There are myths about mysterious lights in the sky accompanying the switching of two souls, usually it was an act of the gods who were granting the wish of someone who wanted to change lives."

_So he did it! _"I don't know how I'm gonna get him out there," is all Jack said.


	15. Chapter 15

_Cal_

He laid aside the bank book, consoling himself about Jack's ascent into middle class by reasoning that he would now be the one reaping all the benefits. "He doesn't know what to do with money anyway. I could have tripled this in half the time it takes him to finish just one of those drawings," he said contemptuously.

_You know he doesn't care about money, right? And neither does she?_

"Oh, that's just ridiculous," he scoffed. "Everyone cares about money. If they didn't privilege wouldn't accompany wealth."

_Better not say that to Rose. Want her to leave him too?_

"She'd never leave him. She made that clear a long time ago."

_She might if he stopped acting like Jack and started acting like you. _

He quickly pushe the thought away. "Doesn't matter," he muttered to himself. "He's got this much and she's fine with it. What'sa little more?" He laid aside the bank book and his eyes fell on the portfolio. "Does he ever do anything else?" He flipped it open and was once again shocked by what he saw. Rose alone, Rose with Jack, clothed and not clothed. In his hands Cal held a tangible version of the most intimate moments of their relationship.

_Still so sure you can be him?_

Cal tossed the portfolio behind him. "I need a drink."

_Jack_

After he left Mulder and Scully he wandered the streets, not sure what to do next. He had no reason to believe what Mulder had said yet he was sure it was true. Somehow the lights had caused this. Somehow Cal's unhappiness and whatever mysterious force was behind the lights had combined to create the situation they found themselves in. _It's just a case of wrong place, wrong time..or right place, right time you might could say. _Whatever the case he had until Wednesday night to figure out a way to get Cal out in the desert. _And how in the hell am I going to do that short of dragging him? _He hoped it wouldn't come to that, but he knew he'd do it if he had to. "Maybe he doesn't want to be more any more than I want to be him," he told himself. "Though why anyone would want to live his life..."

He froze. _Is that...is that me?_ He blinked and focused his eyes on the swaying, blonde figure in front of him. _It is me._

_Cal_

His quest for a calming drink had led to another. And another. And 10 drinks later he found himself stumbling down the street, kicked out of the bar after starting a fight with a man he claimed, "Looked at me funny." Dazed and irritated with Jack's body for not having the kind of alcohol tolerance only years of heavy drinking can build, he didn't notice the black haired man charging at him until it was too late. _Is that me?_ he thought, startled by the sight of himself. He got his answer when he crashed into the ground a moment later. He stared up into his own face. _I really am intimidating looking when I'm angry._

_Jack and Cal_

Jack glared down at him, too overwhelmed by anger to move. "You did this," he hissed, finding his voice. Cal stared at him, too shocked by the sight of himself to understand what he was talking about. "Huh?" Jack shook him. "Have you not looked in a mirror lately!"And then Cal remembered. _Oh yeah..._ "I didn't do this!" he yelled, pushing Jack off him.

They sat on the ground, oblivious to the stares they were recieving. "You did!" Jack insisted. "I know you did! I know how this happened!"

_He does? _"You do?"Cal's calm tone startled Jack. "Yeah," he said. "I know. And I know how to change it back." _And I'm going to change it back, you body stealing asshole. _

Until he knew there was a definite possibility of switching back into his own body, Cal had been seriously questioning his ability-and desire-to remain Jack forever, but no sooner did the words leave Jack's mouth than a fierce desire to keep things exactly as they were overtook him. _Serves him right. He doesn't deserve what he has. _"Who said anything about changing back?" he sneered. "I like things this way."

Jack's mouth curled in disgust. "Ruined your own life so now you want to ruin mine too?"

"_You_ ruined my life!" It was something he'd thought often in the months following _Titanic,_ but he'd never actually said it out loud. As the years went by he'd buried it and had convinced himself it wasn't true anymore. Or so he'd thought.

"It's been 15 years! Are you still not over it?" _Are you over what _he _did? Shut up. That was different. _

"Will you get over it when I go off with her?" Cal snapped. "Forever? Because that's what I'm going to do!" Jack howled and tackled him. He held him down by the throat and raised his fist. "Oh, go ahead and hit me," Cal said calmly. "Seriously. I want you to. Because if you do, she'll ask what happened. And if she asks what happened I'll be forced to tell her what happened. And if I tell her what happened she'll get upset and quite possibly scared and then I'll be forced to comfort her..which I'll just have to find it in myself to do somehow." He smirked. "So, by all means. Hit me. Just once."

A fresh burst of rage ignited in Jack's belly. He tightened his grip on Cal's neck. "Don't you dare touch her!"

"What makes you think I haven't already?" The thought had crossed his mind, but only fleetingly. He didn't know why, but for some reason he couldn't bring himself to seduce her, no matter how sure he was that he could. But Jack didn't need to know that.

Tears of fury glistened in Jack's eyes. "She'd know the difference. There's no way she'd keep believing you're me. If she even does believe you're me."

"What makes you sure she doesn't believe it? You're not that difficult to impersonate. 'I love you Rose. Here I drew this for you when I could have been actually supporting you," he mocked. "I don't know how she can stand living with you."

"_Me_? Your wife doesn't talk to you unless it's to accuse you of being unfaithful, and your children are terrified just looking at you! They all hate you!"

Cal was speechless. It was one thing to know he had a bad marriage and a terrible relationship with his children, but it was quite another to hear it said out loud. _I never loved her, but still.._And he hadn't. He'd only married her because she came along at the right time. She'd soothed his wounded pride, treating him like the king he'd always believed himself to be. He'd been infatuated with her. She'd been everything Rose wasn't, which was great. Until she began to bore him. "No, they hate _you_," he laughed nastily. "They don't even know me."

_Don't hit him. Don't hit him. That's what he wants._ Jack clenched his teeth and exhaled loudly. "You are not me," he said, enunciating each word as though it were as separate statement. "You will never be me. You may have managed to fool her for the few hours you've been with her, but that isn't going to last much longer. You don't know her like I do. You could _never_ know her like I do. You think it's easy being me? You're the easy one. How hard is it to wander around drunk off my ass acting like a smug, self-righteous bastard?" He released his hold on Cal's neck and stood up. "I _will_ get things put back the way they're supposed to be, and there's nothing and no-one on this planet that can stop me."


	16. Chapter 16

AN: Thanks everyone for all the wonderful reviews! They mean a lot.

_Jack_

He didn't know where he was going. He'd shot one last hate-filled glare at Cal and hurried away before one of the people who had gathered in hopes of seeing them kill each other decided to call the police. The last thing he needed was to be in the wrong body _and_ in a jail cell. He could just see Rose coming to bail "him" out and discovering "Cal" had attacked him.

_Rose._ She was his only hope for getting Cal where he needed him to be so they could switch back short of hog tying and dragging him out there screaming. _I'll do it if she doesn't believe me. I'll do whatever it takes. _He checked his watch. "1:00. She has that lunch at 1:30, and she was going by herself. It was that all-women thing…if I hurry I might can catch her."

He peeked through the small window in the door. There she was. She was talking excitedly, gesturing emphatically. Her eyes sparkled. "My Rose…" He laid his hand against the glass. _She's okay. That's the important thing. He hasn't hurt her. _

_But he wouldn't have. He's tr_y_ing to make her think he's you, and for all you know she believes him. _

_It can't last_, he told himself. _She'll know the difference if she's around him too long. _

A few minutes later the door opened and women—and a handful of men—began to file out. Jack ducked his head and ignored the curious glances he received. Judging by the way some of them were dressed there was a good chance they knew Cal, and the last thing he wanted was to encounter another one of his women. Finally Rose came out. She was busy arranging something in her bag and didn't notice him.

"Rose," he said softly.

She turned around. Her eyes immediately narrowed. "What do you want?" she demanded. "How did you even know—" She stopped herself. "No, I don't care. I don't care how you found out I was here. I don't care about why _you're_ here." She took a deep breath and began to walk away. "Rose, please don't," he said, following her. Her back stiffened and she quickened her pace. "Rose, you have to listen to me." She stopped and whirled around. "I don't have to do anything," she spat. "Leave me alone."

"You don't understand. Something has happened. Things aren't the way they're supposed to be."

"What are you talking about?" she asked, curiosity getting the better of her.

"I'm talking about me. And Cal. We're—"

"You're talking crazy. You are Cal."

"No, I'm not. Everyone just thinks I am. Yesterday—"

"You've lost your mind."

"I know it sounds like I have, but please, try and—"

"Why should I believe anything you say? Why should I even be standing here talking to you?" Her mouth curled. "Don't come near me again."

"We have five children," he called as she hurried away. "Three daughters. Two sons. One set of twins. We got married on the beach. I braided the stems of the orchids you carried and you wore them like a crown." She stopped. _She believes me,_ Jack thought. But she shook her head, as if dismissing a thought and kept going. He stood there and watched her leave, too heartbroken to do anything else.

_Rose_

She sat at a small, round table. A conversation was going on around her, but the only voice she could hear was in her mind. _How would he have known that? _

_What do you mean "how"? Your life isn't a secret, and he's the kind of person who can find things out if he wants to. _

_But why? What would be the point?_

_Does there have to be one? Can't who he is just be enough?_

But that didn't quite settle it for her. None of it made any sense. He had tried to talk to her not once but twice in as many days. _And he didn't seem like himself…or at least he didn't seem like the person I knew him as. _She couldn't put her finger on what had been different about him. There was just something. _Jack hasn't seemed like himself either..._

"Helen?"

A dark haired woman with grey eyes turned to her. "Yes?"

"I'm going to go, if you don't mind," Rose said quietly.

"Are you alright?"

"I'm just not feeling very well. I think it would be best if I went home. I'm terribly sorry."

Rose was so distracted by her thoughts she didn't notice when she bumped into a blonde woman on her way out. The blonde glared over her shoulder at her as she kept walking. "Who was that?" she asked, taking Rose's now empty chair.

"That was the woman I was telling you about," Helen said. "Rose Dawson. She—"

"Did you say Rose?"

Across the table, another woman saw the flash of anger in Vanessa's eyes when she heard Rose's name. "So that's who it is," she murmured to herself.

_Cal_

His encounter with Jack had left him shaken. It had never occurred to him that he would do anything but quietly give up his life. He'd forgotten what Jack was like. Overwhelmed and unsure of what to do next, he did what he always did when things got difficult. He had a drink. And another. And another.

He stumbled into the house just a few minutes after Rose got there. She was standing in the living room, lost in thought when he came in. _She'll know the difference…let's see if she does. _


	17. Chapter 17

_Jack_

He walked the streets for hours before hunger and the heat drove him back to Cal's house. As he searched for the kitchen, he noticed the doors to the sitting room were closed. He could hear two women speaking in quick, hushed tones. Had he been in a better state of mind he would have wondered what was going on, but it barely registered.

When he walked past the sitting room again a few minutes later, half-heartedly munching a sandwich, the doors were open. Vanessa was leading a woman toward the front door. Jack nearly choked when she looked over her shoulder at him. _It's her! The woman from the party! _She smirked and turned away.

_What is she doing here? _he wondered.

He would soon find out.

_Rose and Cal_

"Jack," she said, drawn out of her head by the sound of him approaching. He smiled and slipped an arm around her waist. "Have I told you today how beautiful you are?" She shook her head. He tilted her head up. "Well, I'm telling you now." He kissed her hungrily. She collapsed against him, throwing her arms around his neck. _What were you worried about? That he had magically become a different person? That he wasn't Jack anymore? That he was—_but she pushed the thought away and kissed him harder.

_Looks like someone was wrong,_ Cal thought smugly. _She can't tell the difference at all._

Except that she was starting to notice a difference in how Jack normally kissed her and how she was being kissed at that moment. At first she had rationalized it as her mind playing tricks on her. She told herself she was just letting what Cal had said get to her. But as the kiss went on she started having doubts. It didn't feel the same. It didn't feel like Jack. And he wasn't touching her the way he normally did. His hands weren't where he normally put them. They didn't feel the right either. His hands, always so nimble and assured, felt heavy and almost awkward. It was as though he'd never touched her before, as though he didn't know every single inch of her body. _Oh God,_ she thought, panic creeping in. _It isn't possible. There has to be some other explanation. It has to be me. There's something wrong with me. What else can it be?_

_Jack_

Once she had finished showing Alice—for that was her name—out, Vanessa noticed him lurking next to the stairs, holding a half eaten sandwich and looked dazed. She shot him a disgusted look. "What has come over you today? First you don't even come to breakfast, no-one knows where you are all day, and now this?"

Jack had never yelled at a woman before. He'd never even spoken harshly to a woman before. It wasn't his nature. But between Cal's smug insistence that he would never get Rose back and Rose's own refusal to take him seriously, he'd had enough. "What gives you the right to talk to me like that?" he demanded. "So he's a selfish, uncaring asshole. I got that. I got that years ago. But I'm sure you're not much better. Not if you've managed to survive being married to him as long as you have, ordering him around the way you do. I don't know what your life is like or what's gone on between you two, but could you just leave me alone?" His tone softened. "Could you just do that one thing for me?"

Vanessa was too shocked by his outburst to notice he had used the word "he" instead of "I". "That might be the way _she _lets you talk to her, but I won't have it," she hissed.

"Who?" he asked, genuinely taken aback—both by himself and by the mention of yet another one of Cal's women.

"Oh, don't act like you don't know. Alice told me all about what you did yesterday, the way you were acting. And I saw her today. Your flower girl. How could I have missed her with hair like that?"

His eyes brightened. "You saw Rose?" He spoke without thinking.

"Yes, I saw her. You're not even trying to hide it anymore, are you?"

"Where did you see her?" he asked, as though she hadn't spoken. "What did she look like? Did she look okay?"

Vanessa scowled. "You expect me to tell you if your whore looked like she was having a bad day?"

"Goddamnit, just tell me! You think you know what's going on here, but you're wrong. You don't have the first clue what's really going on. I need to know—how did she look?"

"Distracted. She almost killed me because she wasn't looking where she was going," she said. It had been years since Cal had bothered being angry with her, and he only had been a few times. He rarely needed to be. She played her part perfectly. Now even Jack's tame anger was too much for her.

"Distracted," he repeated. "So that means maybe she did believe me…or she's starting to…she's thinking about it…"

_Cal and Rose_

She pulled away. "Well, that was certainly a lovely way to greet me," she said, taking pains to keep her growing panic hidden. "Why does it have to be just a greeting?" He started to pull her closer, but she slipped out of his grasp. "I can't stay," she said apologetically. "Remember? I'm busy all afternoon." _If he is Jack he'll know I'm lying and say something. If he isn't Jack…_

_Is she lying? That's absurd. Why would she lie? It's not like she can tell. _"Right," he said quickly. "I guess I must have forgotten."

Rose just nodded as she walked past him and out the door. She started up the street. She had no idea where she was going. She just knew she couldn't stay there. A cold fear washed over her. "He isn't Jack."


	18. Chapter 18

_Rose_

Breathe," she commanded herself. "Stop panicking. There is an explanation for all of this. People don't just stop being themselves and become someone else. That just doesn't happen. Maybe he really didn't remember if you said anything or not. He's not perfect—as much as you like to think he is—and he's got other things to think about." But she didn't believe a word of it. Nothing could account for the difference in his kiss, the difference in his touch—except the possibility that it wasn't him. There was only one thing to do. And it was the last thing she ever expected to do. "I have to find Cal."

She hailed a taxi, but froze when the driver asked for a destination._ I have absolutely no idea_ _where he would be. _"The best neighborhood in the city," she said. I'll narrow it down as best I can from there.

_Jack_

"What are you talking about?" Vanessa asked, exasperated.

"Huh?" Jack had been so lost in the possible implications of her description he had forgotten she was even there. "Oh. Nothing," he said quickly. "It doesn't matter. Thanks for telling me." He rushed up the stairs. Vanessa watched him go, too shocked to do anything else. A few seconds later she heard a door slam. "Oh, I am _not_ having this."

_Rose_

She stood on the sidewalk and surveyed the two seemingly endless rows of expensive houses. _It could be any one of them. _"So I'd better not waste anymore time." It took 30 minutes and 10 "Are you crazy?" looks before she finally found the right one.

_Jack_

He had just finished dressing after his shower when he heard a familiar female voice screaming in fury. _It can't be,_ he thought, running into the hallway and to the top of the stairs. It was.

_Jack and Rose_

A housemaid, with the help of Vanessa, was trying desperately to keep her outside, but Rose was proving to be more than a match for them. She succeeded in knocking the maid off her and was doing her best to run toward the stairs while Vanessa did her best to drag her back.

"Stop!"

They both froze and searched for the source of the command. Jack was running down the stairs, two at a time. Rose wrenched herself free of Vanessa's grip and hurried toward him. They met at the bottom of the stairs.

"What are you-"

"Tell me something," Rose demanded. "Something only we could know."

Jack's mind raced. "Um...you have two wedding rings. One for when we got married officially and one for when we decided we'd truly been married."

"What else?"

"The second one is a star. I didn't give it to you until our first anniversary."

"Why a star?"

"Because the stars are our place," he said, smiling slightly.

"Something else," she said, though she was afraid to hear any more.

"When we visit your mother she never uses my name, and she never talks to me directly. And she's always sighing and telling the children about how much better their mother could have done and she hopes the girls turn out smarter than you and the boys don't turn out like me at all," he said all in one breath. "When Clarissa and Peter were two they were already trying to draw, and sometimes we think they can read each other's minds because they never seem to talk to each other yet somehow communicate. Nicholas-"

"That's enough," she said, holding her hands up. She looked at the floor and shook her head. "You shouln't know any of that...I can't understand how..."

"Rose, look at me," he said gently. She lifted her head slowly. "This doesn't make any sense," she said. "I know, it's crazy," he said, stroking her face with his thumb.

_Oh God, it's Jack's hands, it's Jack's touch...but it isn't Jack...but it feels like him...It can't be him.._"Jack?" she said softly.


	19. Chapter 19

_Jack and Rose_

He didn't answer. He pulled her close and kissed her. Rose's heart was beating so fast she was sure it would burst out of her chest. _It is Jack!_ she thought. _It can't be, but it is. It's not his body, but he's the one kissing me...somehow. I can feel him. He's holding me the way only Jack does. But it isn't possible!_

They were both breathless when the kiss ended a few seconds later. They stood, paralyzed, and gazed at each other. It may have been Cal's brown eyes she was looking into, but it was Jack she saw in them. "This is crazy," she whispered. "I know. It doesn't make any sense," he said. "But that's why you should trust it." Any lingering doubts she may have had vanished as he echoed her words from 15 years earlier.

"Just what do you think you're doing?" Vanessa shrieked, finding her voice. She had watched the reunion, dumbstruck by what she saw. They stared at her. "Not only do you have her come here, but to stand right in front of me? Discussing the details of your affair as if I'm not even here?"

"It's not what you think," Jack began. "You don't know what's going on. I-"

"Oh, I know _exactly _what's going on," she snapped.

"No, you don't!" Rose said loudly. "It's obvious what you think is happening, but it isn't. I'm not having an affair with your husband. If what I think is going on actually is he's not even here right now-and he's been pretending to be married to _me _for going on two days now."

"Are you out of your mind? Do you actually expect me to believe that? At least have the decency to admit you're trying to steal my husband and not insult my intelligence!" Vanessa sneered.

"From what I've seen I don't have to steal your husband. He hasn't had any trouble pretending you don't exist!" They each took a step forward, glaring intensely. Jack quickly stepped between them. "Calm down. Both of you," he commanded. "This isn't helping." "_She_-" Vanessa began, pointing at Rose. "I said both of you." His tone left no room for argument. "Now, let me explain what's happened."

_Cal_

He wasn't sure what to make of Rose's sudden deparure. He had no way of knowing if she was telling the truth about needing to be somewhere, but he was choosing to believe she was. After all, why would she lie?

_She could have realized you're not who you're pretending to be? That's a reason to lie. _

"No, that isn't it. What, during that three minutes, could have possibily told her?"

He had been with many women, but none of them had ever stood out. None of them had ever been particularly special to him, and he had never taken pains to cultivate a meaningful relationship with any of them. This accounted for the ease with which he was able to forget and often confuse one with another. He had never experienced the kind of bond Jack and Rose shared and was unable to contemplate the possibility that something as seemingly insignificant as the way he'd touched her could have aroused her suspicions.

"I'm not playing him perfectly, but I'm not doing that badly," he assured himself. "There isn't that much to him."

_Jack and Rose_

Rose gripped his hand tightly as he recounted the story.Suddenly it was all starting to make sense. "That's why you-he-kept staring at me yesterday," she said. "I didn't understand it at the time, but now I do. He hadn't seen me in 15 years, and then somehow there he was, waking up next to me..." Jack's stomach twisted as he pictured the scene. Rose, unclothed and unsuspecting, Cal going playing along and pretending to be him..._Stop! Nothing happened. You know it didn't. _

Vanessa's eyes shifted from him to her and back again. Her expression was a mix of outrage and disbelief. "You honestly want me to believe that you aren't my husband, that you just look like him? That the two of you switched bodies somehow because of some mysterious lights in the sky?" She shook her head. "You used to be such a better liar."

"I'm not lying!" Jack insisted. "Why go to all the trouble of making up something like this? If I really was him, and we really were having an affair, why wouldn't I just admit it? Better yet, why wouldn't I just leave you for her now that it's impossible to deny? Think about it," he added. "Haven't things seemed a bit odd since yesterday?"

Vanessa ran the past day and a half over in her head. _He really hasn't been acting like himself. _"Maybe you're right, but that doesn't mean it's because you're really a whole other person on the inside." And then Rose's words sank in. "What did you mean 'he hadn't seen me in 15 years'?" she demanded.

Jack and Rose exchanged glances. They'd both been hoping to avoid explaining their history with Cal, but it appeared that wasn't going to happen. "I meant exactly what I said," Rose explained. "Cal-your husband, my former fiancee-hadn't seen me since April 1912."

Vanessa's eyes widened. "It's you! I knew I'd seen you somewhere before! He used to keep this picture of you-he'd stare at it for hours! I caught him with it once, and he said you were dead. I let it go because as annoying as his obvious obsession was, what harm could you do dead? But you're not..." she trailed off.

"Did he ever tell you _how_ I died?" Rose asked.

"No. I knew he'd been engaged before he met me, but I didn't care much about it. I heard rumors, but I didn't actually want to know anything," she admitted. Her eyes softened. "I hated the idea that he could have loved someone else or that he might still love someone else."

_She really loves him,_ Jack thought. _He doesn't seem to care anything about her, and yet she loves him. _Suddenly he no longer saw her as the controlling, jealous wife she had seemed to be but as a woman who had had the misfortune to fall in love with the wrong man.

"Officially, I've been considered dead since the last time he saw me," Rose explained. "The story is that I-" She glanced at Jack. "We died in a ship sinking."

"We?"

"Rose and myself," Jack said.

"Wait-" Vanessa held her hands up. "I'm not saying I believe this..but who are you then?"

Jack sighed. "That is a whole other, almost equally unbelievable story."


	20. Chapter 20

_Cal_

He paced the length of the living room. "Where could she be?" he wondered anxiously. "Why hasn't she come back yet? Though she didn't tell me what she was going to do, so I guess I don't know how long she might be, do I?" He couldn't shake the feeling that something terrible had happened to her. It was irrational, but he was sure some terrible fate had befallen her. "But that doesn't make any sense, does it? Why would something have happened to her? _What_ could have happened to her? No, wait, don't think about that." He continued pacing. "What if she ran into him? What if he started babbling to her about everything that's going on?" He stopped in his tracks. "No, she wouldn't believe him," he decided, shaking his head. "She probably wouldn't even let him get one word out, probably wouldn't even let him get within earshot." He smiled to himself, grateful, for the first time, that Rose couldn't stand the sight of him.

_Jack and Rose_

"Wait, let me see if I've got this," Vanessa said. "You were engaged to my husband—" Rose nodded. "But you left him for—" She made a slight face. Jack chose to ignore it. "a penniless artist you'd met two days before? And you're—" She pointed at Jack. "him? But you're trapped in Cal's body, and he's trapped in yours?"

"Yeah, that's pretty much it," Jack said. "Told you it was unbelievable."

Vanessa exhaled heavily. "I never said I believed it."

"Could you try?" Jack asked pleadingly. "I'm sorry, but I really don't want to remain in this body forever—" Rose shuddered. "and I'm sure you wouldn't like it if I did. I can get things put

back the way they're supposed to be, but I can't do it alone." He turned to Rose. "Which is why I need you to go back."

She stared at him, not believing what she was hearing. "You want me to go back? To him?"

"He's not that terrible," Vanessa said defensively.

"Maybe he isn't to you, but he was to us," Rose said. "I can't stand the thought of being anywhere near him."

"I could tell," Jack said.

"Oh Jack, I'm sorry!" Guilt filled her eyes. "I didn't know it was you! I—I never imagined—"

"It's okay." He stroked her cheek with his thumb. "How could you have known? I kept trying, didn't I?" She nodded. "Because I trusted that you'd believe me eventually if I just kept at it long enough."

"He kissed me, and I realized that on some level I already knew."

Vanessa watched their interaction, a spark of jealousy igniting in her belly. The depth of the bond they shared was obvious. Jack gazed at Rose so lovingly, he was so quick to soothe her—_It isn't fair! _Not once had Cal ever looked at her like that. Not once had he ever been so eager to make sure she wasn't upset. _And I love him! I actually love the bastard, and for what? So he can ignore me, pretend I'm not here, wish he were someone else? Try to actually become someone else?_ Though she had yet to admit it, she was slowly beginning to believe their story. It was the most absurd thing she had ever heard, yet she couldn't ignore how different "Cal" had been since Sunday morning. Not just his behavior, but his energy as well. He didn't have the same presence he normally did. _He just doesn't feel like Cal._

"Why do I have to go back?" Rose said. "Why can't you just switch things back now?"

"We can't switch back until the lights are in the sky again, and that won't be until Wednesday night," he explained. "That's why you have to be there. You have to make sure he doesn't suspect what's going on, and when the time is right you have to get him out in the desert. We have to be out there where we were when this first happened." _And one of us has to wish to be someone else,_ he added silently.

Rose's face fell. "I have to stay alone with him for two more days? Why can't we just go get him, keep him here until it's time, and make him cooperate?"

"That is my husband you're talking about!" Vanessa interjected indignantly.

As much as the image of Cal bound and gagged appealed to him, and as much as he hated the thought of sending Rose back to him, Jack knew it was the best way. "You don't have anything to be afraid of." he assured her. "He's convinced you'll never figure out he isn't me, so just play along and you'll be fine." Rose's eyes held an unspoken question. "No!" he said emphatically. "I don't care if he realizes you know everything, don't take it that far."

Rose looked relieved. "I wasn't planning to."

Jack pulled her close. "I was so afraid you wouldn't find out the truth until after—"

"I would have found out long before things ever got that far."

They clung to each other, neither wanting to let go. "You should be getting back," he said finally. She nodded. "If that's what you think is best." He kissed her, a long, deep kiss. "Go," he whispered, closing his eyes. She squeezed his hands one last time before walking away.

Vanessa laid a hand on his arm. "You can open your eyes now. She's gone."

"Thanks. Look, I'm sorry about—"

"Why bother? Is it your fault he only married me because I happened to be in the right place at the right time? I'm a fool for loving him the way I do."

Jack covered her hand with his. "You love who you love. Nothing any of us can do about that."


	21. Chapter 21

_Cal and Rose_

"J—Jack?" she called hesitantly as she stepped into the house. _Be calm! He has to think you don't know anything! _She had spent the entire walk back going over all the reasons why this was the best way to get Cal where they needed him to be in order to put things right, and up until then she thought had succeed in convincing herself. If she was with him it reduced the chance that he would decide to take Jack's body and run, and since he didn't seem to have any idea about why they had been switched—much less any idea about how they might be switched back—it would be fairly easy for Rose to talk him into walking right into their trap. She saw the sense in the plan, but she didn't like it. "In the kitchen" was the response. She took a deep breath. _You can do this. You pretended to be in love with him before, didn't you? Well, no, actually it was obvious to anyone who saw the two of you together that you didn't, but—Oh, just shut up!_

"What're you—Wow," she gasped. "Did you make all of this?"

Cal surveyed the meal spread out on the table. "I did."

"Why would you do that?"

"I did it for you," he said, sincerity in his voice.

_He's just trying to do what he thinks Jack would. Don't get sucked into it. Don't forget who he is. _"You didn't have to do that," she said. "Really."

"I know." He offered her a chair. "I wanted to."

And the surprising thing was, he actually had wanted to. In an effort to quell his paranoia he had decided to explore the one area of the house he'd yet to really pay much attention to: the kitchen. He wasn't sure where the idea came from, but suddenly he had the urge to cook for Rose. "She'll probably be hungry when she gets back from wherever she is, and Jack would do it," he reasoned. There was also a third reason: he wanted to do something nice for her. He wanted her to give him "the look" again, the happy, loving look she only gave to Jack.

He didn't get the look, but he did get a smile. _It's better than nothing. _

_Better than what you'd get if she knew it was really you and not him. _

_Jack and Vanessa_

"He really isn't that bad," she said. They were having dinner alone. The children had left to go back East and stay with Vanessa's family earlier that day.

"Who? Cal?"

"Yes. He's really not, or at least he wasn't. I don't understand why Rose seems to hate him so much."

"He was to her. Maybe you didn't see the same side of him we did. Maybe it's because you chose to marry him, and when Rose didn't get to choose whether or not she wanted to."

"The worst thing he's ever done to me is ignore me," she said, stirring her food around. "He didn't always ignore me quite so much, but I never occupied much of a place in his thoughts."

"In its own way that can be just as bad as what he did to her—to us. Because you love him."

"I know what you must be thinking. 'How stupid can she be?""

"You are not the first woman to tell me they know what I'm thinking, and she was wrong too. That's not what I was thinking. It's like I told you before, you love who you love. There's really nothing you can do about that. Believe me. I know." His eyes took on a faraway look.

"You miss her, don't you?"

"So much."

"You were trying to get back to her all along, weren't you? That's why you kept disappearing."

"Yeah. She was the first thing I thought of when I woke up that morning. I didn't know where I was or how I'd gotten there, but I knew I had to find her. She wasn't with me, and she was supposed to be."

"That's—" _The way I wish my husband felt about me._ "really amazing. That you love her so much."

Jack smiled to himself. "I've loved her since the first moment I saw her. Standing up on that deck, she was completely out of reach and everyone around me couldn't tell me enough that I would never even know her name, that she would never even _look_ at someone like me, but I didn't care. She was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. Eventually she noticed me staring, and she did look at me. But he came out a second later. She left in a huff. He just stood there looking confused and frustrated."

"I can't believe he actually followed her outside."

"He never did that with you? He wasn't controlling and always sending spies out after you?"

She laughed bitterly. "I told you. All he ever did with me was forget I was there. It all makes more sense now," she added. "He married me because he knew I was safe. I loved him, and I loved this kind of life. I was the exact opposite of her. Which is ironic, if you think about it, because right now he's trying his best to stay with her."

"It isn't about her, not really. He never knew her as a person. She was always a beautiful prize to him. A prize he lost, I might add. He's wasted all this time, and now he's convinced himself if he can become someone else things will be different. He will be different. The only problem is, it isn't his life. She doesn't love him, and she never will."

"And the woman who does love him is wondering why she does," Vanessa said sadly.

"If he could see you, just for one second, he'd love you," Jack said. "But I don't think he can see anyone, not even himself."


	22. Chapter 22

_Cal and Rose_

She couldn't believe what was happening. Not only had he cooked for her, but what he'd cooked was good. More than good, actually. She hated to admit it, but the entire meal was delicious. And not only that, but he was talking to her. He asked her about her day, and he seemed genuinely interested to hear what she had to say. Rose couldn't remember a time when he had ever been interested in what she had to say. During their engagement he'd been annoyed by her "impudence", but now he seemed to welcome it. As her nerves settled and she lost herself in the story of her day-minus a few key events-she almost forgot who she was talking to. There was no doubt he wasn't Jack, but a part of her wondered if he was really Cal.

_He's just not the same,_ she thought. _What happened? _

_It isn't him you're seeing. He's just acting this way so you'll think he's Jack. _

_But he's had Jack's body since yesterday. If he hates his own life so much, why didn't he just run away? Why stay here and pretend to be Jack-of all people?_

_Do you really need to have it spelled out for you?_

Rose was uncomfortably aware of the most likely reason why Cal had been doing his best to "be" Jack. They had a good life together-_A wonderful life_-and he'd seen that. For him it wasn't just a matter of wanting a different life. He wanted the life he felt he'd been cheated out of. _As if he would have been any happier with me._

"You got really quiet," he said.

"I was just thinking."

"About?"

"Life. For instance, what if we had never met? What if you hadn't bothered to come and try to help when you saw me hanging off the back of that ship? What if I _had_ jumped? I know you say I wouldn't have, but let's just pretend I might have. What then? I'd be dead, and no-one would have any idea how it happened. They probably would have never even figured out where I disappeared to."

_She was trying to jump off the ship, and he talked her out of it? That's how they met? _He'd always suspected Rose's explanation for how they came to be in the compronise position they were found in was a lie, but he'd never imagined it had been anything like that. _She was really that unhappy? _"Why are you thinking about that?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. I wonder sometimes how things would have turned out if one of us had acted differently. How would things have been different if you'd never come to talk to me that morning? Or if I hadn't been too scared to admit how I felt then? Think of all the time I wasted trying to deny the truth-time we could have spent together."

"I guess it's good things worked out the way they did," he said slowly. He was having trouble processing everything she was saying. In the days following _Titanic_ he'd often wondered just how their affair had begun, what exactly had happened to send Rose flying so eagerly into his empty handed arms, but he'd never been able to truly see it. No matter how hard he tried their relationship had always remained a mystery to him. Until then.

_What are you doing?Are you_ trying_ to anger him? _She knew she was acting irrationally and quite possibly jeopardizing the plan, but there was a part of her that wanted to see his facade crumble. Even a small crack would do. She couldn't help it. _I just want him to admit he isn't Jack. I want him to admit that he's a lying bastard._

_Let go of that,_ her mind insisted. _If he gets angry you don't know what he might do. _She didn't care what he did to her, but she couldn't bear the thought of what would happen if he stopped them from switching back. "But it doesn't really matter," she said quickly. "Things are the way they are, and I'm very happy with the way my life has turned out."

_Did you hear that? She's very happy with the way her life has turned out. Her life with him. The man who talked her out of throwing herself off the back of a ship_. _The man she jumped back onto a sinking ship to be with. A man who is most defintiely not you. You are the man who drove her to the aforementioned suicide attempt. _

_Shut up. _

_Don't like the truth?_

_Shut up. She doesn't know I'm not him. She loves him, so since I look like him she loves me. And eventually she'll start to love _me _and not him. I can make her love me. _

_Jack_

He didn't sleep any better that night than he had the previous night. He tossed and turned, just as worried about Rose as ever. _I shouldn't have sent her back. What was I thinking? Why did I think that was the best way? She was right. I should have just been a man, gone in there, and kicked his ass. This would all be over now. Okay, it wouldn't be, we'd still have to wait another two days, but at least Rose would be here. With me. Where she belongs. _

He kept trying to picture what she was doing. She would probably be in bed. "With _him_." he said through clenched teeth. He rolled over onto his stomach and buried his face in the pillow. _Stop thinking about it. Nothing is happening. You know she'd never let him touch her._

_But what if she isn't letting him? What if she said no and-_

"Just stop!" he yelled into the pillow. "You're here. She's there. There's nothing you can do short of bursting in to save her, and she may not even need saving. Things are fine. She's smart. She evaded him for months. She can handle two days."

When he finally did fall asleep his dreams were filled with images of Rose and Cal.


	23. Chapter 23

_Rose and Cal_

She slept badly that night, waking up every few hours. She didn't have the same kind of worries weighing on her mind that Jack did, but she may as well have for all the rest she got. Cal, on the other hand, slept like a baby, his arm draped across her. She wished she could have avoided his attempt to hold her, but saying anything would have just aroused suspicion. _Just be grateful you didn't arouse anything else_, she told herself as she slipped out of bed. She crept across the room, holding her breath as she went. _Don't wake up. Don't wake up. _She wasn't afraid. She just wanted to avoid talking to him for as long as she could.

She tiptoed out of the bathroom and did her best to hurry silently across the room. She winced as the closet door squeaked when she opened it. She reached inside and grabbed the first thing her hand landed on. Pulling it out, she turned and was about to head back into the bathroom when-

"Are you leaving?" He rubbed his eyes and sat up.

"I have to," she said, hoping she sounded convincing.

"Oh." Disappointment shone in his eyes.

Rose felt a pang of guilt. "But I won't be gone all day. I'll be back around 1. Remember?" _Why the hell did you just say that? What is wrong with you? You don't owe him anything! What, he looks at you with Jack's eyes and you just forget-_

_Shut up! I didn't forget anything. And it doesn't matter that those are physically Jack's eyes because with him looking through them they're nothing like Jack's eyes really are. _In fact, she hated looking into them because when she did she could clearly see Cal lurking behind them. It unnerved her. _I don't know why I said it. I just felt bad for a moment. I know he's only been nice to me so far because he's got this insane belief that he can find happiness by stealing Jack's life, but there was just something about the way he reacted..._She didn't care about him. She knew that wasn't it. _It was a moment of ill-conceived compassion. Nothing more._

"Yes," he said, his expression brightening.

She wasn't sure what to do next. She was standing in her pajamas-which consisted of an old pair of Jack's pants and shirt-and awkwardly holding her clothes for the day. _You can't get dressed in the bathroom. He's awake now. He'll wonder why. He knows you wouldn't have any problem getting dressed in front of Jack. _She took a deep breath and forced herself to remain calm. She turned slightly so he could only see her profile and began to dress.

_Don't stare at her! Do you think he leers at her like some kind of animal? _

_He gets to see her everyday. He doesn't have to stare. _

_She's his wife. She doesn't mind if he looks at her. She _wants _him to look at her. She still lets him draw her. Do you know how disgusted she'd be if she knew it was you looking at her right now?_

_Well, it's too bad I'm the one here instead of him, isn't it?_

_Jack_

He bolted out of bed and dressed as fast as he could. "I'll be back!" he called as he passed Vanessa on the stairs. She watched him run out the door, too bemused to respond. She didn't bother wondering where he was going. There was only one person he could hurrying to like that.

He was too lost in his own head to see the person coming toward him as he rounded the corner, and by the time he noticed her it was too late. He crashed into her, knocking her to the ground. He lost his balance and landed on top of her.

_Jack and Rose_

"I'm so sorry!" he exclaimed, jumping to his feet. He was so busy apologizing he failed to realize who she was. "I wasn't paying attention-"

"Jack!"

He stared at the woman lying next to his feet. "Rose? What're you-"

She raised an eyebrow. "So shocked to see me?"she asked lightly. "So shocked you have to send me sprawling on the sidewalk to contain it?"

"I was actually coming to see you," he said, shame washing over him. He knew it was an accident, but that didn't make him feel any better. He would never have hurt a woman intentionally, but just the thought of that he might have hurt Rose even accidentally made him feel sick. "Are you alright?" he asked, bending down and offering her his hand.

"I'm fine." She took his hand and let him help her to her feet. "Really."

Jack looked her over, searching for signs that her fall had injured her more than she was letting on. "Are you sure? I was running really fast-"

"Jack." She laid a hand on his face. "Stop worrying about me."

"Okay."

She took his hand and they began to walk back in the direction from which she'd come. "You were in quite a hurry," she said.

"As far as I was concerned I wasn't going fast enough."

She squeezed his hand. "Well, I'm with you now." He wanted to ask her what had happened when she went back home, but he knew he couldn't. It would just make it seem as though he didn't trust her. _It isn't her I don't trust._ "What exactly were you planning to do once you got to me?" she asked.

"I honestly don't know," he admitted. "I just knew I needed to see you."

"I felt the same way."

They walked in silence until the rumbling of Rose's stomach became too loud to ignore. "Are you hungry?" He couldn't believe he hadn't asked before. She nodded. "I didn't eat breakfast." "Me either." They looked at each other for a moment before descending into a fit of giggles. "I didn't want to eat with him again," Rose said when their laughter had subsided.

His eyes filled with concern. "Is it awful? Being with him?"

"It's nothing like it was back then. He hasn't said one harsh word to me, and in a strange way that's worse. I can't stand knowing he's only being so nice to me because he's trying to be you." She shook her head. "He's still the same person underneath, no matter how hard he's trying to act like someone else." She decided it would be best not to go into details about Cal's various attempts to do what he assumed Jack would.

"It'll be over soon." He kissed her softly. "I promise."

"I know. It's just so hard being away from you."

"I know. I can't stand it either," he said. He kissed her again, more urgently this time. She wrapped her arms around him and hugged him tightly. They were too consumed by their need for each other to notice Alice eagerly watching from across the street. She had ducked behind a bush when she saw them approaching. "Looks like Vanessa couldn't do anything about this, but I wonder how her husband would feel if he knew?" She didn't have the first clue who Rose's husband was, but she was confident she could find out.


	24. Chapter 24

_Jack and Rose_

"Do you really have to go?"

Rose nodded. "I do. I told him I'd be back by one." Jack sighed. All morning they'd avoided going anywhere there was a chance someone might recognize one of them. They'd ignored their protesting stomachs and refused to have breakfast until they were sure they'd found the tiniest, most obscure restaurant in the entire city. They'd ducked into corners and doorways when it looked like one of the few people they were acquainted with in Roswell was approaching.

And now she had to leave. To go back to him. _We've been married for 15 years, and he's still finding ways to pull us apart._ "I had to say something. He would have been suspicious if I hadn't."

"I know. It's just...you're _my_ wife goddamnit!" Jack slammed a hand into the building in front of him. "It isn't fair," he added wearily, letting his head hang down.. "We shouldn't be letting him control us like this. It's what he wants."

The pain and frustration in his eyes cut through Rose like a knife. "I can't stand it either,"she said, gently laying a hand on his shoulder. "Last night he just kept _looking_ at me, and I knew he was smirking on the inside. Congratulating himself on what a fine acting job he was doing. Laughing about how stupid and gullible pretty little Rose is." Her voice cracked slightly. "And I couldn't go to bed to escape like I used to because he was there too, next to me, _touching_ me-"

Jack's head snapped up with a loud _pop_. "He touched you?" The quiet rage in his voice scared Rose more than any amount of hysterical yelling ever could have. "Not like that," she said quickly. "I think he wanted to, but he didn't really try. It doesn't matter because I wouldn't have let him if he had." She grimaced. "He was _holding_ me. I know it's not as bad, but-"

His stomach twisted. "No, Rose. It _is_ just as bad."

"I was wearing clothes," she said, hoping to diffuse the blaze in his eyes. "Yours." _You should have kept your mouth shut. Why did you have to go and upset him like this? Hasn't he been through enough these past few days?_

_You fucking idiot! How stupid could you be? You had a choice and you chose to send her back to him? She would never have gone if you hadn't asked her to. You're supposed to be protecting her!_ "It doesn't matter. It's still you being forced to let him put his hands on you, and if he can get away with something small what's to stop him from trying for more?"

"_I _will," she said firmly. "Do you think I wouldn't?

"I believe you would try. Really, I do. Please don't think this is about me not trusting you because I do. But if he wanted to bad enough..." Jack couldn't bring himself to say the rest out loud. _And what if it had come to that last night? What would you have done then?_

_I would have killed him. _As he heard the words in his mind he knew it was true, and it wouldn't have mattered if it had been Cal or any random stranger. His feelings would be the same. _I would kill him with my bare hands. _

_Wouldn't change the fact that you could have stopped it and didn't. You could have found another way to get him where you need to be and kept her with you. Where she's safe._

Rose lowered her head and closed her eyes. "What are we going to do then?"

"I don't know," Jack said shakily. He wrapped his arms around her. She buried her face in his chest and hugged him tightly. "But you're staying with me. I'll find another way to make this work. That's what I shoulda done all along." He laid his cheek against her head. "I'm so sorry Rose. I shoulda never put you in that situation. I was supposed to take care of you and I didn't."

She looked up at him. "It could have been worse. It-"

"Is not getting the chance to get any worse. You trust me, and I put you in a situation where something awful could have happened to you. I'm not doing that again."

_Cal_

Rose had been gone for almost five hours, and Cal was bored. He'd finished reading her third book two hours after she left, and he'd gone over the house again, searching for anything he hadn't found the first few times he'd looked through it. "What does he _do_ all day?" Cal wondered, disgusted. "Why doesn't he have a job?"

_He does. He's an artist, remember? That's what he does all day._

Cal snorted. "If nude drawings of Rose can be considered _art_."

_Speaking of which, how much longer do you think it will be before Rose starts asking why you haven't been drawing? How many more days do you have before the questions start?_

"I don't have to explain anything to her. I'm-"

_Supposed to be Jack Dawson. Not Cal Hockley. And Jack would tell Rose anything she wanted to know._

"I'll just tell her I don't care to do it anymore then."

_You honestly think she'll believe that? _

Cal was saved from any further debate with himself by a sharp knock on the front door. He hurried across the room and threw it open. His jaw dropped when he saw who was on the other side. _Stop staring you idiot. She doesn't know it's you._

_Maybe not, but what the hell is she doing here?_

"May I come in?" Alice asked impatiently. Cal nodded and stepped aside. He closed the door as she moved past him. "I suppose you're wondering who I am," she said, giving the small room a quick once-over.

"Yes, I am," Cal said, trying to keep sound casual.

"My name isn't important. What is important is that I need to tell you something."

"O-okay. What is it?"

She took deep breath and put on her best apologetic face. "I hate to have to tell you this Mr. Dawson, but your wife is having an affair."

"What?" His voice was hoarse.

She nodded slowly. "I'm afraid it's true. I saw her with another man."

"How do you know it was _my_ wife? How do you even know who either of us are?"

"Let's just say that Rose and I have a few mutual acquaintances."

_She's lying. She has to be. There is no way in hell Rose would ever be unfaithful. At least not to him. _"Do you know who the man was?" He tried not to sound anxious.

"Actually, I do." She paused and looked at her feet. "I was so shocked when I found out. You see, he's married to a very good friend of mine, and I just can't believe he'd be willing to risk hurting her like that." She looked up at him through thick, black lashes. "And now that I've met you I can't believe Rose would be so stupid as to choose him over you."

"Who is he?" Cal demanded.

She lightly ran her fingers up his chest. "Does it really matter?"

He roughly grabbed her by the shoulders. "Tell me."


	25. Chapter 25

_Cal_

Darkness swam before his eyes. The room spun. His hands fell from her shoulders. "Are you okay?" she asked. He nodded dumbly. _She know!. How can she know? How the hell can she know? How could he possibly have gotten her to believe him?_ He didn't bother trying to delude himself into believing Rose might be kissing "Cal" on street corners because she had changed her mind and decided he was the one she wanted after all. That was beyond wishful thinking. It was downright impossible, and he knew it.

"I'm sorry," Alice said, somehow managing to sound both sympathetic and seductive at the same time. "Really I am. I just thought you deserved to know." He nodded again, barely hearing her words. She bit her bottom lip and ducked her head. "If there's anything I can do," she said, looking up at him through her lashes. "Don't hesitate to tell me."

"Anything, huh," he said, sliding a hand up her arm. She nodded and stepped closer to him. He knew he needed to be focusing on the unraveling situation with Rose, but he felt he owed himself something for all the trouble he'd gone through. _There's plenty of time to crush him like the insect he is later._

_Jack and Rose_

"Jack, where are we going?" Rose asked anxiously. They'd been walking non-stop for almost an hour. He'd been muttering to himself and shaking his head the entire time. She trusted him completely, but his odd behavior was making her a bit nervous. _Why did you have to say anything? Why couldn't you just keep your mouth shut?_

Jack put an arm around her shoulders. "I'm sorry if I'm scaring you. I'm just trying to figure out what we should do." She wrapped an arm around his waist and gave him a small smile. "It's okay. I understand."

"I was hoping some amazing plan would come to me if we walked around long enough," he admitted. "But clearly that isn't gonna happen."

"We could keep walking around," she offered. "I don't mind."

He shook his head. "It's too hot for that. And you haven't eaten in hours."

"Neither have you."

"Don't worry about me. All I need to be doing right now is thinking."

"You can eat and think at the same time," she said firmly. "In fact you'll think better with a full stomach," she added.

Jack sighed. "You're right, but I don't think I _can_ eat." The thought of Cal touching Rose, in any way, seemed to have permanently turned his stomach. _Should've thought about that before you sent her to him. But you _weren't_ thinking were you? At least not about her. All you were thinking about was yourself. You were thinking about how to make the ending of this whole thing easier on yourself. _

_Was I?_ he wondered. _Was I only thinking about myself? _Shame washed over him. _It seemed like the easiest way, but why was I so sure he wouldn't hurt her? Why did I think he could be trusted to keep up his act? What the hell was wrong with me?_

"Jack?"

Her voice brought him out of his head. "Sorry," he said, squeezing her shoulder. "Let's get in out of this sun and get you some food. We can figure out what to do after that."

_Cal and Alice_

Alice smoothed her hair, tucking the loose strands back into a bejeweled barrette. "Anything else I can do?" she asked with a smile.

"Actually, there is," Cal said. "I'd really like to find this guy. Do you think you could help me do that?"

She nodded eagerly. "I know exactly where to find him."

"Good. I have a feeling he'd be able to recognize me, so could you help me get close to him? I'm sure you could do a much better job of earning his trust than I could," he said, his voice thick. "That is, if you don't mind."

"I don't mind at all." In fact, there was nothing she wanted more than to hurt Cal. _And if _she_ gets hurt in the process, well, that's just too bad. Should've kept her hands off him. _The irony of the fact that she had just, as far as she knew, slept with the husband of the woman she was seeking revenge against for stealing her married lover was lost on her.

Cal flashed her his best attempt at Jack's irresistible smile. _She couldn't tell it was me,_ he thought, feeling slightly triumphant. _I'll bet Rose wouldn't have been able to tell either. _"Good," he said again. "That's very good." He didn't know what he was going to do yet, but he was certain he would figure something out. _You think you've won, don't you Dawson?_ _Well, that was the battle. The real war's just beginning._

_Jack and Rose_

No longer caring if anyone saw them together, they had a long and expensive lunch. Courtesy of Cal, of course. Rose tried to protest against Jack taking advantage of the situation, but he would have none of it. "He's been taking advantage of you all along," he said. "The least he can do is give you a good meal."

"Give _us_ a good meal. You have to eat too."

"I'm eating," he said. He took a large bite of his roll. "See?"

"Just keep it up," she said. "Please."

"I will," he said reassuringly. "Stop worrying about me and eat some yourself."

After they finished they found themselves wandering the streets again, no destination in sight. Jack knew they couldn't just keep walking around for the rest of the day. It was really much too hot to be outside at all, and he could tell from the look on Rose's face she was being affected by it. He wasn't sure where to take her though. He didn't want to go back to Cal's house. It would just be too strange, and he didn't want to parade their relationship in front of Vanessa. It would just remind her of how empty her own marriage was.

"I've got it," he said suddenly.

"What?"

"I know where we could go. I can't believe I didn't think of it before. I mean, we can't go home, and I don't know about you but I really don't want to go back to Cal's place-"

"No," Rose said firmly.

"Exactly," he continued. "We need somewhere neutral. Somewhere we can rest and decide how to handle things."

"And this magical place would be?"

"You'll see," he said, hailing a taxi. He opened the door for her with flourish. "After you, miss." Rose giggled at his attempt to sound posh. "Won't you tell me where we're going?" she asked as he closed the door behind them. "I said you'll see." He turned to the driver. "We need a hotel," he said, resuming his posh accent. "A damn good one." Jack had had enough. If Cal wanted to steal his life, then he could steal Cal's life for a little while. It was one of the few times that he would act first worry about the moral implications of his actions later.


	26. Chapter 26

_Jack and Rose_

Unfortunately, it was even hotter in the small car than it was outside, and they arrived at their destination-after what seemed like hours but was actually only a few mintues-with flushed faces and sweat soaked clothes. Rose didn't even have the energy to bother protesting when Jack asked for the most expensive room in the hotel.

"Ughh," she said, collapsing onto the floor of their room. "I think we're in hell."

Jack dropped down next to her. "You know, I've been thinking that for a fews days now, but now I'm sure of it."

"Why did we think it would be a good idea to come here?"

"I wanted to paint the desert."

"Oh right. You thought you'd do landscapes."

"I thought if it was something besides trees it might keep my attention. Shoulda stuck with you and the kids. None of this would've happened."

"It's not your fault, Jack." She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. The room was beginning to spin. "What happened happened," she continued slowly. "All we can do now is get through it."

"You're right." He rolled over onto his side. He brushed a strand of damp hair from her face. Her skin felt almost clammy. "Rose, are you okay?" She nodded. "I'm fine. Just a little dizzy from the heat."

He laid a hand on her cheek. "You don't feel fine."

"It's nothing," she insisted. "I just need to cool off."

"Well," he said rising to his knees, "those heavy clothes aren't gonna help you any." "Are you suggesting I undress?" she asked, doing her best to sound haughty and offended. But she just sounded drained. "That's exactly what I'm suggesting," he said as he began to unbutton the front of her dress. "You should too," she said with a sigh.

He lifted her up and slipped her arms out of her sleeves. "Well, we'll worry about me after we've taken care of you."

"Why won't you get in here with me?" she asked a few minutes later. She was sitting in a cold bath. "You don't feel well. I can see it in your face."

"You know I don't like cold water," he joked.

"Then at least take off some of your clothes and let your skin get some air. Please?"

"I'm okay. I'm comfortable like this."

"Your hair is wet and sticking to your head. How is that comfortable?"

"That's just how his hair is," he said with a shrug. "It's normal. He has strange hair. I'm fine." He didn't know how to tell her the thought of being naked, with her, in Cal's body, was just more than he could bear.

"Jack, please, just get in here with me," she said wearily. "I don't care that you look like him."

_How does she know? _"You-you don't? It wouldn't make you feel-"

"No. Because I don't see him at all. I only see you. So please-" She splashed water on him. "-get your ass in here."

_Alice_

"So," she said, looking around the room. "Where is Cal this morning?"

If Vanessa found either her sudden arrival or her question strange, she hid it well. "He's taking care of some things," she said pleasantly. "He should be back later this afternoon."

"Nothing serious, I hope."

"Oh no_."_

"Did anything ever come of what I told you yesterday?" Alice asked, doing her best to sound as though she weren't interested.

"While I appreciate your concern and am grateful you told me, I don't think this is something you and I need to be discussing," Vanessa said an edge in her polite tone.

"Of course. What was I thinking?" Alice said apologetically. "Please forgive me."

"I-" Vanessa's reply was cut short by a ringing phone. "Will you excuse me?" she said, hurrying into the hallway. She pulled the sitting room door closed behind her, but it didn't catch. Alice tiptoed over to it and pressed her ear to the crack.

"Uh-huh." She heard Vanessa say. "Yes, I understand. I thought you were with Rose. Uh-huh. I'd do the same thing if I were you. Room 920? Uh-huh. At the Marquis. I've got it. Don't worry about me, I'll be fine. Just stay with her." Alice dove back into her chair as Vanessa hung up the phone. "Sorry about that," Vanessa said, coming back into the room. "I hope you weren't bored waiting for me."

"Oh no, not at all." Alice smiled widely. "Not in the least." She looked at her watch. "I really must be going, actually."

"Well?" Cal said impatiently as she rushed outside. "Find out anything?"

"I didn't think I would. It was obvious she wasn't about to give anything away, but then the telephone rang."

"So?"

"So be patient and listen. I don't know for sure who was calling, but they were with someone named Rose."

"That's a helluva coincidence," he said pensively. "Did she say anything else?"

"She just said she wasn't surprised they were with her and told them to stay there. I thought that was a bit odd, especially if it _is_ him. Why would she be sending him off to another woman?"

_Because she knows too. What's more she's helping him. How does that sonofabitch do it? _"That's not important. Did she say where they were?"

"As a matter of fact, she did."


	27. Chapter 27

AN: This chapter might be a bit more M than T at times. Just a heads-up. More updates are coming. Sorry it's taken a few days. I've been sick this weekend.

_Cal_

"I don't know why we're back here." Alice grumbled. "Why did you even bother having me find out where they are if you're not going to do anything about it?" Cal slammed his fist against the mantel. "I told you," he said quietly. "I have a better idea. If you can't be patient, I suggest you leave. I can do this without you. It isn't as though I've never dealt with these two before," he added.

_Didn't you fail miserably the last time? Didn't they end up living happily ever after anyway?_

"Not for long. There isn't a sinking ship to distract me this time," he muttered to himself.

"What are you talking about?" Alice's voice was thin with exasperation.

"Nothing," he said dismissively.

"You said something about having dealt with them before. What did you mean?" She moved closer to him, her eyes wide with curiosity. "Have they done this before?"

_Don't_ _blow this! You need her whether you want to admit it or not. She's a stupid slut, but that just makes her all the more useful. _"As a matter of fact, they have." He turned away from her and pressed his fist to his forehead. "I just never thought it would happen again," he said sadly. "How could I have been so wrong?"

"You poor thing," she said sweetly. She slid a hand up his back. "How could she do this to you?" He shook his head. "I just don't know. I don't understand what I did wrong." She ran her fingers through his hair. "It isn't you," she cooed. "It's her." He turned to face her. "Do you really think so?"

"Just forget her," she said cupping his chin. "She doesn't deserve you."

"How do I do that?"

She brought her face close to his. "Let me help you."

_Jack and Rose_

He wanted to tell her to finish getting dressed. He wanted to tell her that if she loved him at all she'd put on something besides a bra and panties. But as he stood awkwardly on the other side of the room, trying his best _not_ to look at her, he was at a loss for words. He'd given in and gotten into the tub but within three minutes had made an excuse to get out. "I should call Vanessa," he'd said. "So she doesn't wonder what's going on." Rose had given him a puzzled look, but she'd accepted his reason. He'd breathed a sigh of relief as he jumped back into his clothes. Crisis averted. Or so he'd thought.

An hour later Rose lounged on the bed her eyes closed, legs crossed at the ankle, arms behind her head. Her fiery curls spread out like a fan. Her skin glistened with the water she hadn't bothered to dry off herself after leaving the tub. Her white bra was damp and clung to her full breasts in a way that made Jack wish he were blind.

_Stop looking at her! Just turn your head. The window's right there. Look out the window. There are people on the street, look! You love to watch people you don't know. _But little by little his head would turn and he would find himself staring at her again.

_Go over to her_.

_No! I can't touch her. _

_Why not? You've never had any problem touching her before. _

_Things are different. I'm different. It wouldn't really be me._

_You kissed her, and that was okay. How would anything else be different?_

_It just….it just would be. It wouldn't be right. _

"Jack, why are you staring at me like that?" Rose's voice brought him out of his debate with himself and back to reality. She was sitting up, her arms crossed in front of her stomach, her legs hanging over the side of the bed. Her expression was a mixture of confusion and concern. "Are you okay?" she continued, standing up. "I—I'm fine," he said quickly. "Really. Don't worry about me." She moved toward him. "You don't look fine…." Jack sucked in his breath as her hand landed on his face. He forced himself to look at anything but her.

"Why are you doing that?"

"Doing what?" He tried to keep his voice steady.

"A second ago you couldn't seem to stop looking at me, and now…Jack, look at me," she demanded quietly. "Please."

_I can't. I really, really can't. I don't know what I'll do. _

_That's a lie. You know exactly what you'll do. _

A short yelp of surprise escaped Rose's mouth as Jack's arms encircled her. His hands flattened against her back, pressing her to him. His lips crashed into hers. She stiffened for a moment before wrapping her arms around his neck. "Jack," she whispered. He groaned and hugged her tighter. Moving as one they stumbled toward the bed.

"Rose…."

"Jack…"

She fell backwards, pulling him down with her. She closed her eyes as his lips moved down her throat. She couldn't have explained it if she'd wanted to. He didn't feel like Jack. His body was just so _different._ And yet…

_It's him. Those are Jack's hands, Jack's lips. _

Jack knew he should stop. It was wrong, somehow. It had to be. But he couldn't. It was as if he were being driven by some force much stronger than himself. _You can't do this. _

_Why can't I?_

_You're taking advantage of her. You have to be. _

_Because I look like him? It's not the same as him looking like me. _

"Jack! Jack!" Rose's cries silenced all lingering doubts. _  
_


	28. Chapter 28

_Jack and Rose_

He gently nuzzled her neck. "I missed you." "I could tell." She ran her fingers through his hair. It was soft and clean. There was no trace of the oils and pomades Cal usually slathered on it. "I never knew it could feel like this," she said, a trace of awe in her voice. "Yeah, I've been washing it," Jack said with a grin. She giggled. "I bet he'd die if he could see what you've done to his hair. He's a very vain man, you know."

"Oh, I figured that out," he said. "One look through his closet was all it took. He's got more shoes than you." Her mouth dropped open in mock surprise. "I do not have that many pairs of shoes!"

"Whatever you say…" He reached for her as she slipped out from under him. "Hey, where're you goin?" He sat up and wrapped an arm around her middle. "You know I don't mean it. I'd give you all the shoes in the world if I could." She leaned back against him. "And you know I don't need that." She looked at him over her shoulder. "If I'd needed that I would have stayed with the real him."

"Yeah, I know, but it doesn't change how I feel. I still want you give you—and our kids—everything."

She kissed his jaw. "I couldn't ask for anything more than what we have together. And on top of everything you gave me five beautiful children—"

"I didn't do much there. That was all you."

"Fine. We gave them to each other. That work for you?"

He nodded. "Sounds about right to me." He released his hold on her and climbed off the bed. "What are you doing?" she asked as he picked up the telephone and began dialing. "I don't know about you," he said, "but I'm hungry. I feel like I haven't eaten in days."

_Cal_

He stared up at the ceiling and wished for sleep. Alice, her head on his arm, snored quietly. One of her arms was draped over him. He wished he could push it off, roll onto his stomach and bury his face in the pillow, his body spread out like a starfish, but he couldn't. He had to keep her happy. For a little while longer at least.

He'd explained the plan to her, watching her eyes light up with excitement as he went. _She's one twisted bitch_, he'd thought. _Why didn't I ever notice that before? _If he'd been completely honest with himself he would have known it was because he'd never cared before. There were things he liked about Alice and things he didn't. There were things he noticed about her and things he didn't. Words coming out of her mouth had usually been the latter. He much preferred when women were quiet, their mouths busy with other things, but this newly discovered dark side of hers would be quite useful. And not only that, but she appeared to be strangely devoted to him.

_Why is she so willing to help me? _he wondered. As much as his ego told him to believe it was his talents as a lover—she _had_ come back a second time, after all—he sensed it was something deeper. But what? Was it Jack's body? Did he have some sort of animal magnetism that just drew women in?

_No, that can't be it. If that were true Rose would be here now and not with him. _A fresh wave of loathing washed over him. _The bastard's in my body, and he's __**still**__ got her. _He grimaced as Alice shifted in her sleep, her body moving closer to his. He hated the part after, when they wanted to touch him. All of them did. They always did, without fail. _Every slut I've ever been with._ All he ever wanted to do at the end was get away as quickly as he could. Keep his head down, avoid their eyes, and stay silent until he was safely away.

_But you liked it when Rose held you. You like it when she laid her head on your chest and wrapped her arms around you. Don't act like you didn't. I know you did. I __**am**__ you, remember? You__ hugged her and buried your face in that hair of hers. You slept like a damn baby. What makes her so different?_

Cal squirmed, ashamed of his own thoughts. He hadn't just liked it when Rose held him. He'd loved it. No woman had ever touched him like that before. He'd loved the way her body felt against his, the way her arms tightened around him, breathing in the scent of her hair..._It smelled like lavender. And her skin smelled like vanilla. And her mouth tasted like…like rain, I guess you could say. Sweet and pure. _

He closed his eyes and breathed deeply as the memories flooded his mind. The gentle way she had touched his face that first morning, her eyes filled with concern. The tenderness in her kiss despite the hurry she was in. The loving glow that came into her face whenever she looked at him. It had all been so wonderful.

_It wasn't yours. It was never yours._

_Shut up. You're me, as you said, so that means you know there's nothing I can't have. Nothing out of my reach. _He nudged Alice.

_Then why are you about to use another woman to satisfy your fantasies of the one that left you? Twice?_


	29. Chapter 29

_Jack and Rose_

As they munched on the feast Jack had ordered despite Rose's protests through clenched teeth—"Jack, nooo!"—they finally began to tackle the issue of what to do next. "We can't just stay here forever," Rose pointed out. "Yeah, but it's not like we can go home," Jack said. "I mean, we could, but we'd have to deal with him if we did. Technically, it's my house for the next month which means that right now it's his."

Rose sighed heavily. "Why can't he just…_want to go home_? Would that be too much to ask? He has a wife of his own who loves him—God only know why—and he's running around pretending to be you, acting like his own life doesn't even exist. What kind of a person _does_ that?" she cried, covering her face with her hands. "Rose, honey, it's okay," he said, putting an arm around her. "It's gonna be okay." He moved her hands off her face and kissed them. "We'll get through this, just like we've gotten through everything else."

"It's not fair," she said sadly. "I know how that sounds, and I don't care. Haven't we gone through enough? Wasn't everything we did just to be together enough?"

"I wish I could tell you why this is happening. I wish I could say there was some grand, cosmic reason for all of this, something that would make it all make sense, but I can't. I don't know why this is happening to us, but I know we'll get through it. It might not seem that way now, but we will." He pulled her closer. "Do you trust me?"

"Oh, you know I do."

"Then don't worry. Besides, I have an idea."

Her eyes brightened. "You do?"

"Yeah. I haven't worked it all out yet though. But I'll get it," he added. "Right now we need to figure out what you're going to do tomorrow."

"What do you mean?" she asked, her eyebrows knitting in confusion.

"You're supposed to teach tomorrow," he reminded her. "It's Wednesday."

"You're right. I'd completely forgotten." Her eyes became clouded. "Do you think I should?"

_No,_ he wanted to say. _I don't want you leaving my sight until I'm back in my own body and we're hundreds of miles away from him. _But what he actually said was, "I think you should do what feels right to you." _Damn it Jack! Why do you have to be so supportive? Why can't you just look at her and say, "Don't do that. Do this instead"?_

_Because I wouldn't be me if I did. Because I wouldn't be the man she loves if I did._

_Details, details…_

She thought for a moment. It would be easy to not go. It wouldn't take any effort at all. When morning came all she'd have to do is _not_ get out of bed. _Not_ get dressed and leave. _I could spend the morning lying in Jack's arms. _It was a nice thought, but she knew she couldn't do it. "I'm going," she said finally.

"Are you sure? What if something happens?"

"He wouldn't risk trying anything in public. Besides, I don't think he even knows where I would be. And I'm not letting him control me," she added, a new edge in her voice. "I put a stop to that a long time ago. I'm not letting it start up again. I'm married to _you_, not him."

Jack knew there was no arguing with her. "Okay. But I'm going with you." He held up his hand as she opened her mouth to protest. "I understand how you feel, and I understand how it'll look me being there. Like this," he added, glancing down at himself. "But I need you to understand how I feel. Rose, if I sent you off and something happened to you…if I sent you off alone, _again_ knowing he's out there so pissed off he probably can't see straight anymore I wouldn't be able to live with myself. Even if nothing happened to you, just knowing it could have…"

"Alright,' she said. "I see your point." _I wish you were wrong. I wish you were just overprotective, but I know you're not._ "Though I'm not sure it even matters," she continued, chuckling quietly. "I don't have anything clean to wear tomorrow anyway."

Jack grinned. "Well, if you'll indulge me one more time I think I can fix that."

_Cal and Alice_

"Do you understand what you're supposed to do?" he asked. She rolled her eyes. "For the hundredth time, yes. You explained it to me last night, and then another thousand times this morning. I've got it. It isn't a terribly complex plan, you know."

"The best plans aren't." _You're not wrong. That plan you had to become him was one of the most complicated you'd ever had. Now, that plan you had to have him dragged off for stealing the diamond, __**that **__was a helluva a plan. _"And it would have worked," he muttered to himself. "If she hadn't gone running after him." And suddenly it was like he was back there again. He could hear his own words echoing in his head, the shock and anger in his voice. _"You're going to __**him**__! T—to be a whore to a gutter rat!" _And the defiance, the utter contempt for him in hers. _"I'd rather be his whore than your wife."_ She'd been so calm when she'd said it, so sure of herself.

_Well, Rose darling, you did choose him. So he's the one you're getting. Whether you like it or not. _

**AN: I'm going to update the other stories soon. I promise.**


	30. Chapter 30

_Rose_

She took his face in her hands. "Nothing is going to happen," she said firmly. "Trust me." He leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "It's never you I don't trust," he said quietly. She stroked his cheek with her thumb. He smiled weakly. "This feel a bit backwards to you?" She chuckled. "I can be comforting too, you know." He kissed her forehead again. His lips lingered this time. "Yeah, I know." She took his hand. "We need to go." He nodded. "If you're sure." "I am."

They walked quickly and stared straight ahead as they went. Rose smoothed her dress anxiously with her free hand. It was more expensive than anything she'd worn in years, and she was terrified of ruining it somehow. She'd tried her best to talk Jack out of getting it, but nothing she'd said would deter him.

"I don't need this," she kept insisting. "Really." He took her hands in his. "I know you don't, but I want to give it to you. I know it's weird because it's not really _me_, but this is the closest I've ever come to being able to being able to give you what you deserve. So let me, please." She sighed. "Jack, I—"

"Please. For me."

"Why is this so important to you?" she asked. "We've been married for 15 years. Surely you can't still be afraid I'm going to leave you because you're not rich, and you can't think I've been secretly missing all of this."

"I'm not afraid of either of those things. I got over that a long time ago. It's just…."

"What?"

He ducked his head. "Being him the past few days has made me realize how much you could have had."

"Did you forget everything I _wouldn't_ have? If I'd married him I'd be like Vanessa—only worse. I doubt he's ever laid a hand on her. Jack, do you really think that would be better?"

"It isn't like that. I just—I just wish I could give you more. I wish somehow there was a way we could keep the money and the security without me staying him forever." There was a heaviness in his eyes she hadn't seen in years. Not since the first days after the sinking and again after he came home from the War. "Fine," she said. "But we're not spending any more of his money after this. I'd rather be naked than have him buy me anything else."

Jack grinned. "That a promise?"

She stuck her nose in the air. "Don't be vulgar."

Her stomach knotted as she remembered the laugh they'd shared after that. The stares from the puffed-up store clerks that had just made them laugh even more. _I wish we were still back there_, she thought. She didn't know why, but she had a terrible feeling in the pit of her stomach. Dread was the best word she could think of to describe it. She just hoped Jack couldn't tell. _He's worried enough as it is. _

"I'll be here," he said when they reached the room. "When you walk out that door in two hours, I'll be here." She kissed him gently. "I know you will be. Don't worry, Jack. What can happen?"

_An hour and a half later_

_Alice_

She hurried down the crowded sidewalk. She'd lost track of time, and now it seemed everyone in the whole city was on the same sidewalk as her, walking in the opposite direction. It was like swimming against the current. _The whole plan hinges on me,_ she thought. _If I'm late it won't work. If I'm late the whole thing's shot to hell. _But it seemed impossible. Only the thought that she would be giving up the chance to hurt Cal kept her going.

She reached the campus about twenty minutes later, out of breath and slightly dizzy from running in the heat. "Where did he say she would be?" she wondered, looking around. Her eyes landed on Jack. He was leaning against one of the buildings, his head down, smoking. "Well, this might just be easier than I thought."

_Jack_

"Won't be much longer," he murmured to himself. "Only a few more minutes. You'll go in there and get her. You'll take her back to the hotel, make sure she's safe, and then you'll deal with _him_."

The sound of approaching footsteps made him raise his head. "Oh shit…"

"I never expected to see you here," Alice said pleasantly, a smile plastered on her face. "What are you doing?"

"Waiting for someone."

"Anyone I know?"

"No. I have to go in and get her any minute now, so please, leave me alone," he said flatly. The last thing he needed was another encounter with Cal's spurned mistress. _He's got women coming from every direction,_ Jack thought disgustedly. _Why couldn't he just leave Rose alone?_

"You can't mean that," she said, moving closer to him. She laid a hand on his shoulder. "That's just no way to act." He shrugged her hand away. "Please," he said firmly. "Just go." Her eyes narrowed. "You think you can just toss me aside because someone else caught your eye?" she spat. "Because that redheaded bitch—"

"Don't call her that!" Jack cried. "You don't know the first thing about what's going on," he said a moment later, his voice calm. "I don't care what you think is happening. You're wrong."

"Oh, her husband and I have already talked all about it.' She smirked. "And we're not letting this go on any longer. Jack's blood ran cold. "He's got you out here to distract me, doesn't he?"

_Cal_

There she was. She looked confused. She kept turning her head from one side to the other, as if she were searching for something. Or someone. _Alice must be doing her job right_, he thought.


	31. Chapter 31

_Rose_

Where was he? Had she heard wrong? "No, he said he'd be right here," she murmured to herself. "He wouldn't say that and just not show up." She bit her lip. What if something had happened to him?_ Now you're just being paranoid. He probably went for a walk or outside to smoke. Except he doesn't really smoke that much anymore...He does when he's worried or unhappy, _she told herself. _He just went outside and lost track of time. _She briefly considered going to look for him, but since there were two doors leading outside-one at each end of the hallway-there was a chance she would choose the wrong one and they would miss each other. The last thing she wanted to do was make him worry even more.

"Jack?" she called anxiously after a few minutes had gone by and there was still no sign of him. Her call was met with silence. "Jack!" she called again, louder this time. The feeling of dread she'd had earlier that morning was back, and it was getting worse with each passing second. She let out a sharp yelp of fear when a hand landed on her arm. "Yes?"

_That's Jack's hand. And his voice. _

But for the first time she didn't find either comforting.

_Jack_

He brushed past her not bothering to wait for an answer. "No!" she screeched, jumping in front of him. She blocked the door with her body. "I won't let you do this."

He spoke quietly, but there was no mistaking the anger in his tone. "I don't care what he told you or what wrong you think you're righting. I don't give a damn about your perspective on any of this-or his either, for that matter." He took a step forward. "I don't hit women, but that doesn't mean I won't move you if you don't get out of my way."

Alice's lower lip trembled. "After everything I've done for you..." Her shoulders slumped. She offered no resistance when Jack took her by the arms and moved her to the side.

_Alice_

She watched him hurry into the building, too shattered to do anything else. She didn't even care that she'd given up, that the plan was pretty much a failure now. "What's the point?" she said with a sigh. "It won't get him back." The fact that she'd never really had him to begin with never entered her mind. She'd known about Cal's reputation before they met, but she let him pursue her anyway. She told herself it would be different. She could keep his attention. She could give him what he needed.

As he grew smaller her sadness began to give away to her original anger. Who was he to make her fall in love with him and then abandon her? Did he not know who she was? "No-one treats me like that," she hissed.

_Rose_

She whirled around, her eyes flashing angrily. "What are you doing here?" Cal feigned innocence. "I don't know what you mean. I just came to see my wife."

"I'm not _your_ wife," she spat. "A fact you're well aware of."

His eyes narrowed, and he smiled. There was a kind of cruel arrogance in his smile that she hadn't seen since the last time she'd stood face to face with him-the real him. It was unlike any expression she had ever seen on Jack. Her stomach twisted. _He's not Jack. You know he's not. Don't let him get to you. _

"Oh really? Because that's not how it looks from my end."

"You're not him," she said, taking a step back. He moved closer to her. "A fact you're only well aware of because he ran crying to you," he said disgustedly. "If he'd just accepted things as they are you'd have never known."

"I would have known!" she cried. "I did know! I didn't need him to tell me!" He gave her an "aren't you cute" look. "Sure you did." He grabbed her by the arm. She dug her heels into the floor as he began trying to pull her forward. "Let go of me!" she screamed. He dug his fingers into her soft flesh. She twisted her body, but his grip was like iron. Jack's strength was something she had always loved about him. It made her feel safe. She'd never once imagined it might be used against her.

"I don't want to hurt you," Cal said calmly. "So don't make me." Rose laughed bitterly. "No, you just wanted to rape my mind for the rest of my life." His face twisted. "You could have been happy with me!" She stared at him in disbelief. "Did it ever occur to you that if I'd wanted you I would never have left you? I would have married you when I had the chance? I don't love you!" she yelled. "I was only able to stand being in the same room with you because I thought you were-" Her words became a cry of pain as he shoved her into the wall.

She glared at him as he leaned down, bringing his face close to hers. She could feel his breath on her cheeks when he spoke. "You listen to me," he said menancingly, "You're married to him, and as far as everyone else is concerned I'm him so that means you're married to _me_."

"You're such a sad, delusional man. Do you honestly think-" Her words were interrupted again, this time by his fist smashing into her face. Her neck popped from the force. Her eyes burned with hatred as she looked at him through her hair. "You've been waiting almost twenty years to do that, haven't you?"

"I told you I didn't want to hurt you!" He squeezed her arms, digging his fingers in as hard as he could. She sucked in her breath and clenched her teeth. "You made me do that! Just like the last time!" She scoffed. "Keep telling yourself that. Keep telling yourself it's my fault. It has nothing to do with you being a-" She closed her eyes as he raised his hand. Her body stiffened as she waited for the blow.

But it never came.

_Jack and Cal and Rose_

Cal felt a strong hand grab him by the wrist. "Youlet go of her yousick sonofabitch!"Jack screamed. Without thinking he released his on Rose as Jack twisted his arm and shoved him to the ground. He landed his knees, catching himself with his palms.

"Oh Rose," Jack said softly, temporarily forgetting Cal existed. She stared at him with wide, frightened eyes. There was a bruise forming on her jaw, and blood trickling from her bottom lip. He gently took her face in his hands. "I'm so sorry. I shoulda never walked away, not even for a second." _You let this happen! How could you do that?_

Her voice shook. "It's okay, Jack."She was too relieved that _he_ was okay to give any thought to herself.

Cal watched from the floor, disgusted by what he saw. _In my body. He's in my goddamn body!_ _Ane she's still all over him! _He lunged at Jack, hoping to take him by surprise, but just as his body was about to slam into him Jack took a step back. Cal found himself hitting the ground once again. This time he was too stunned to catch himself.

He quickly pulled himself to his knees, but before he make it to his feet a sharp pain ripped through his stomach. He looked up to see Jack standing over him, his face twisted with hatred. He opened his mouth to speak, but as he did so Jack's fist collided with his stomach a second time. It knocked him flat on the floor. He lay theregasping for air. _What the hell just happened? Where did he come from? She was supposed to keep him away!_

"What's the matter?" Jack spat. "Don't like getting hit?" Cal yelped as he kicked him in the side. "Someone needs to teach you how to treat a woman!" He kicked him again. "And they need to teach you not to try to take what isn't yours!" He reached down and grabbed Cal by the collar and hauled him to his feet. "You hit her once, and I never got to do anything about it," he said, shaking him. "I'm not letting that happen again."

"Dawson, I never knew you had it in you," Cal saidwith a smirk. "She did have to rescue you after all. I guess that's why you married her, isn't it? Grateful she didn't leave you to drown like the worthless rat you are? I mean, we both know what you like about her-" Jack's fist crashing into his face silenced him. Breathing heavily, Jack raised his hand to hit him again.

"Don't," Rose said. He looked at her. "What?"

"Don't," she reapeated. "Jack, you're hurting yourself. When you get back in your body, you'll have to deal with this." Her eyes were heavy. "And no matter how many times you hit him, it won't change anything. You know that."

He sighed. "Yeah, I know." He let go of Cal, who took a shaky step back. "If you ever even think about coming near her again," he said, "Nothing and no-one will be able to make me stop hitting you. If you _ever _even look in her direction again there is nothing that will stop me from making sure it's the last thing youdo." Cal nodded dumbly. _Why are you listening to him? _He didn't know why. It just didn't seem possible not to.

"Glad you understand," Jack said, turning his attention back to Rose. "Are you sure you're okay?" He gently wiped the blood off her mouth with his sleeve. "He didn't hit you more than that one time?" She shook her head. "I'm fine, really." She looked over at Cal and then back to Jack. Although they were in the wrong bodies she could see their true selves shining through. _How could I have missed it for so long? _

Cal started to move toward the door. "Where do you think you're going?" Jack demanded, never taking his eyes off Rose. Cal froze. _He can see me? _"Just stay right there," Jack said. "I'm not finished with you yet." _I'm through playing these games with you,_ he added silently. _I'm getting my body back tonight whether you like it or not. _

None of them had noticed Alice watching from the other end of the hall, nor did they hear the door slam as she left.


	32. Chapter 32

Jack got his body back that night. It was easier than he'd dared hope it would be. Cal didn't even try to run away or fight him. Neither he nor Rose could explain it. He just nodded dumbly to everything either of them said. It was as though Jack's blows had hit much deeper than any of them could have ever imagined, or maybe it was watching them together that did it. Cal himself didn't even fully understand it, but as he watched Jack take Rose into his arms and kiss her tenderly something came over him. He didn't suddenly understand their relationship, and in fact the thought of them together still sent his head spinning and his stomach churning. He just realized there was nothing else he could do. Even in Jack's body he couldn't discover the secret of making Rose love him. Keeping them apart was impossible, and since he didn't want to live in Jack's body forever-if he couldn't have the blissful existence and beautiful, adoring wife that went along with it, that is-he did something he'd always vowed never to do. He admitted defeat.

_That Night_

"Do you see anything?" Rose asked. Her head was thrown back and her eyes searched the black sky. Jack shook his head. "Not yet. Keep lookin." A few yards away Cal was searching the sky as well, but his effort was mostly to ward off another attack from Jack. Despite his somewhat Adonis-like physique he much preferred when his fights remained strictly non-physical.

"There!" Jack cried. He pointed at a streak of light in the sky. "There it is!"

"Are you sure it's not a shooting star?" Rose asked anxiously.

"I'm sure," Jack said confidently. "See how it's moving? It's just like the lights we saw on Saturday." Rose's eyes followed the path traced by his finger. "I see it. Jack, I see it!" She grabbed his arm. "But now what?" she asked. "Well, they said it had something to do with wishing to be someone else," he said, pulling her into a hug. He closed his eyes and breathed in the scent of her hair. "So we wish."

A lump formed in Cal's throat as he watched their embrace. _Why couldn't that have been me?_ _Why couldn't she have been like that with me?_

_Maybe because you didn't let her be?_

It was true. He hadn't let her be like that, and had they remained together he never would have. It was so ironic it was almost funny. Everything he loved about her-everything he'd secretly loved all those years ago-was everything he would never have let her be. _A good repuation comes at a price. _And for the first time he wondered if his was worth what he'd paid for it. He squeezed his eyes closed as the lights passed over his head.

"Jack!"

Rose's joyful cry echoed across the silent desert. Cal opened his eyes to see Rose throwing her arms around Jack-the real Jack. He looked down at himself. "I'm me again," he murmured.

Jack blinked away tears as he stroked Rose's face. "I can't believe...you're you again," she said, gazing up at him with shining eyes. He kissed her deeply. "Believe it," he whispered. "It's really me." She smiled. "I can tell."

_How can she tell?_ Cal wondered as he walked away, unnoticed by either of them.


	33. Chapter 33

When Cal returned home that night it was to an empty house. A folded sheet of paper lay on the small table in the entryway. His name was written on the front. "Whose handwriting is that?" he asked no-one in particular as he picked it up. "And where the hell is everyone?" He unfolded the paper and began to read.

_By the time you read this,_ it said, _I will be gone. I'm torn between thinking you'll see this as the granting of a wish and thinking you won't notice at all. I'll be keeping the children with me which I'm sure is what everyone prefers. Please don't try to contact me. Any gestures on your part would be, as they say, "too little, too late". I know everything that's been going on these past few days, so if you're wondering what brought this on you can find your answer in your attempt to indefinitely impersonate your ex-fiancee's husband_. _I doubt I could have ever done this had recent events-however bizarre-not happened. I loved you. I do love you. But I deserve more than this. _

_Vanessa_

Cal read the note a dozen times before its meaning finally sank in.

Jack'shomecoming, on the other hand, was far more joyous. When they reached their street he scooped Rose up in his arms and carried her the rest of the way. She giggled as he tried to unlock the front door without dropping her. "I could do that," she offered. "No, I've got it," he said. A moment later he actually did get it. "See?" he said triumphantly, pushing the door open with his foot. "You're very talented my love," Rose said pulling him in for a kiss. He kicked the door shut behind them. "I try."

Rose wriggled out of his arms and to her feet. "Hey, where're you goin," he said, slipping an arm around her waist. He hugged her from behind. "I've missed you," he whispered, his lips against her ear. She shivered. "I've missed you too" She looked at him over her shoulder. "So much. I was so afraid you'd never-" He cupped her chin and kissed her lightly. "It doesn't matter now. It's all over. And hey," he added with a grin, "we're just as strong as the night you jumped out of a lifeboat to be with me." Rose couldn't help but laugh. "I knew that even without all of this." Jack kissed her again, harder this time. "So did I."

"Jack," Rose sighed. She turned to face him and wrapped her arms around his neck. His hands slid up her back, pressing her to him. "Yes?" he teased. "I need you to take me somewhere," she said, kissing his throat. "Now."

After that night the rest of the summer flew by. Jack finally got to try his hand at painting the desert but soon discovered, as he'd always suspected, there was a reason he didn't do landscapes. Monet may have been his favorite artist, but they were nothing alike. He went back to using the scenes and people around him as subjects. Rose continued to teach, and she grew to love it more with each passing day.

"I think I should do this again," she said as they lay on the couch together one afternoon. Jack didn't answer. He just played with her curls, letting them slide through his fingers. "I think I'm good at it," she continued. She raised her head. "What do you think?"

"I think you can do anything you want to do," he said. "Isn't that what I've always told you?" She nodded. "I think a part of me keeps waiting for you to finally start disapproving of me," she admitted sheepishly. Jack stared at her for a moment before he burst out laughing. "I never realized how funny it was," she said, puzzled by his reaction. "Oh, Rose, honey," he said when he could speak again. "That's never gonna happen." He brought her head back down to rest on his chest. "I love you just as you are, and besides, as your mother can't point out enough, it's my fault you're like this."

Rose just rolled her eyes. "You saw what my mother wanted me to marry."

At the end of August they packed up their things and returned home. One by one their children followed. There were tears in Jack's eyes when he greeted each of them. All five of them gave him a funny look when he finally stopped hugging them, but he didn't care. _If they knew how close we came to never seeing each other again, _he thought, _they'd understand. _Things went on as they always had, and Jack and Rose put the "incident" as they called it behind them completely. There wasn't any reason to ever think about it again. At least, not until the day Rose realized she had missed her monthly cycle for the second time.


	34. Chapter 34

**AN: So here it is, the last chapter! I sincerely hope it doesn't disappoint. I want to thank everyone who has reviewed. They mean a lot to me. I hope you all have enjoyed the story because I try to write the best stories I can in hopes that a few people will enjoy reading them. And if you wanted Rose and Cal to end up together, well, I'm sorry. That was never my intention with this story. **

While Rose was debating about how to tell Jack about their possible sixth child, Cal was discovering that life without Vanessa wasn't at all what he'd expected it to be. At first he'd been happy she was gone. Finally he could live in peace. No-one to glare at him over the breakfast table if he stumbled in at dawn. No-one to scare off potential mistresses. He left Roswell the day after discovering Vanessa was gone. When he arrived home he made yet another discovery: she'd already started divorcing him. Although about half of their friends and acquaitances took her side, few of them did so publicly. To publicly support a woman who had abandonded her husband-no matter what they knew or secretly thought about him-was simply unthinkable. Cal, true to form, didn't care that a great deal of the symapthy he recieved was fake as long as he was getting it and she wasn't.

In the first few days after regaining his own body he'd considered changing. If he could say he learned something from the ordeal it would go a long way toward sooothing the wound of being rejected by Rose yet again. But he'd quickly dismissed the notion. Who was_ she _to tell him how to live? How low had he sunk if he was taking tips about happiness from the likes of them?

_There was a time when you wanted to be like them. There was a time when you thought they were happy. _

"I wasn't quite myself that day," he insisted. "I was out of my head, what with finding myself trapped in his pitiful excuse for a body. It's only understandable that some of my actions were a bit strange."

He never bothered to read the documents Vanessa's lawyer sent him. He just signed each one. She could have whatever she wanted. He hadn't care if she was around, why should he care if she was gone? And if giving in to her requests would keep her out of his hair-which he'd wasted no time before restoring to its usual state-than give in to them he would. He didn't even care that he might never see either of his children again. What was the point? It wasn't as though he'd seen that much of them when he lived in the same house with them.

But about two months later he found himself sitting alone in his study, an untouched drink by his hand. It was odd. He could drink as much as he wanted to now, but for some reason he no longer felt the urge to. It just wasn't as enjoyable without someone there to disapprove. "I don't miss her," he said to himself. "That it isn't it." He tapped the arm of his chair. "I've just forgotten what it's like to live alone. That's all it is. The house is quieter than it's been in years, and I'm not accustomed to it."

Just then, the doorbell rang.

"It's eight o'clock at night," he grumbled as he rang for someone to answer the door. "Who could possibly be here?" A moment later he found out. "Miss Alice, sir," one of his maids said with a quick curtsy. She hurried from the room as Alice stepped forward. Cal's eyes widened. "Alice," he said, trying to mask his shock. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm here to make you a proposition," she said. The corners of her mouth turned up slightly. "I know how much you like those."

He regarded her with interest. "I'm listening."

One week later Jack and Rose were enjoying a rare breakfast alone when Jack almost choked on a piece of toast as he read a headline proclaiming "Steel tycoon's surprise wedding". "What's wrong?" Rose cried. He coughed and tilted the paper toward her, "Have you seen this?" She gasped. "Does that say what I think it says?" She scanned the article. "Did his wife really leave him?"

"Looks like," Jack said. "Good for her. I never thought he'd actually marry that woman-Alice, though. Huh. I never knew what her name was."

"Well, she did help him try to keep us apart," Rose said. "Maybe he's repaying her, but I'm not sure how marrying her would do that."

"You didn't see what I saw. She helped him when she thought he was me because she couldn't stand the thought of him being with anyone else."

"I just don't understand all these women," Rose said, her brows knit. "What do they see in him?" Jack shrugged. "Who knows? It's not important anyway. Besides, if he married her that fast she was probably pregnant."

"Who think so?" Rose said, a slight quiver in her voice.

"Yeah. Why else would a guy like that settle for something so small and quick?" He noticed Rose's face was slowly being drained of color. "Rose, are you okay?" he asked, touching her cheek. "I-I'm fine," she said unconvincingly. "I just haven't been feeling well lately."

"I noticed that," he said quietly.

"You-you did?" _How did he notice? I did everything I could to make sure he wouldn't!_

"Did you think I wouldn't?" He laid his hand on hers. "Are you gonna tell me, or do I have to guess?"

"What would you guess?" she asked, managing to keep her tone even.

"Well, if I didn't know any better I'd say you were pregnant again-" Her face paled even more. "Wait," he said. "You are, aren't you?" She nodded. "I think that's what it is."

"But how?" he blurted out. _You have a real way with words, anyone ever tell you that? _"What I mean is, we always-"

"I know we do," she said. Her voice trembled. "I don't know how it happened...unless it was when we were in New Mexico, which actually make sense given the timing."

Jack's mind raced. _A sixth child? We're going to have a sixth child? _

They'd spaced out the first three as best they could, but their eagerness to have children had caused them all to be born in fairly quick succession. During Rose's third pregnancy they'd agreed it was best to stop. They weren't destitute, but supporting the five of them wouldn't be easy. Jack had also been concerned, despite what Rose's mother said to the contrary, about the toll any more pregnancies might have on Rose's body. They were as careful as possible, but in 1922 things began to change for them financially. Suddenly they had more money than they'd ever expected to have. Rose was rapidly becoming a published and well respected author, and Jack's art was beginning to attract attention. So they decided to add a fourth child. They were both only children, and they'd each always dreamed of having a big family. When their fourth child had also come with a fifth they were overjoyed. Finally their family was the size they wanted it to be-and the size they wanted it to remain.

"I'm sorry Jack," Rose said. "I-"

"Didn't do this by yourself," he said. "I was there too, you know." And then the full implication of what she'd said began to sink in. The only time they'd made love without thinking about contraception in recent memory was during the "incident" in Roswell. _And the first time I was..so it might be.._ Jack's face began to pale.

"We can't know," Rose said, finishing his thought for him. "Not yet anyway." He laced his fingers through hers. "Know what? Know if it's mine? We already know." She looked at him as if he'd sprouted a second head. "But when you were-"

"Doesn't matter," he said. "It was still me making love to you that night. That makes this my child-_our _child." Tears threatened to blind Rose. "Do you really mean that?" He stroked her cheek with his free hand. "Maybe we didn't plan to have another child," he said softly, "but that's okay. It doesn't mean we'll love this one any less, and it is _our_ child." Rose wrapped her arms around him and buried her face in his chest. "I was so afraid to tell you."

Jack kissed her curls. "Why? You know I'd never hurt you. You do know that, don't you?" he asked, a hint of fear in his voice. _Have I done something? Why would she be afraid to tell me?_

"I know that. I was just afraid you'd be angry because we said we wouldn't have any more."

"Like I said, we didn't plan this, but that doesn't mean I'm not happy about it."

She looked up at him. "You are?"

He nodded. "Look at the five beautiful childen you've already given me. Why wouldn't I be happy to have another one?" He kissed her forehead. "Our love made them all, but especially this one."

Seven months later Rose gave birth to their third son. He had dark red hair, but his eyes were bright blue. The same blue as Jack's eyes. Jack and Rose welcomed their new son with as much excitement as they had each of their previous children, and neither of them ever commented on the color of his eyes. There was no need to. Rose's mother threw up her hands and wailed about how they would never be able to feed yet another child, but they ignored her. She'd never thought their marriage would last beyond the first six months, and besides, it was the same thing she did after each of their children was born. Jack would never say it out loud, but he secretly suspected she liked their children more than she cared for them to know. He didn't bother telling himself the same was true of her feelings for him. She made those clear too often. But as long as she didn't upset Rose or the children, he didn't really care.

And across the country, a few hours after Rose, Alice also gave birth to a son with beautiful blue eyes. Cal never asked and she never said, but they both knew who the father was. He didn't see any reason to bring it up. After all, hadn't it actually been him she'd slept with those few times? What did it matter that she'd conned him into marrying her by saying the child she was carrying was his? In a weird way, it was. And in another weird turn of events he found himself with the adoring wife he'd wanted so badly, though it never occurred to him that he'd had one all along.

As for Vanessa, she discovered that Jack had been right. She eventually did find someone who could see-and love her. She came to realize that as much as it had hurt at the time, leaving Cal was the best decision she ever made. Not because he was a bad person. In fact she never wavered in her belief that deep down he was a good man who'd just been manipulated and misguided. It was the best decision she ever made because no matter how much he _could have_ loved her, he just didn't. And she-like anyone else-deserved better than that.

Cal did see his first two children again, but it wasn't until they were both adults. Their relationship with him was awkward and strained, but it was still better than it would have been had they grown up with him. Neither of them knew anything about the "incident", but one day Fitzwilliam did ask him an odd question.

"Do you remember that time, just before Mother left you, when we were in New Mexico?" he said. Cal nodded. He hadn't thought about any of that in years. "I remember. Why?"

"Do you remember that afternoon when you came in and found me in the sitting room?" Cal nodded again. _What the hell is he talking about?_ "Well," he continued, "I just thought you should know that afternoon meant a lot to me." He avoided his father's eyes. Their relationship had none of the potentially violent undertones it had once had, but that didn't mean it would allow such a display of emotion.

"It did?" Cal said. He searched his brain. Why couldn't remember it?

"It did," Fitzwilliam said hesitantly. "It was the first time I realized Mother was right. Deep down you did care for me." _Oh God, I said far too much. _

Cal just nodded again. "I'm glad you realized that."

Later that night, as he sat alone in his study, the pieces finally fell into place. "It was Dawson. He's the one who...I would have never..." And a little piece of him wanted to thank Jack for showing his son the kindness he hadn't been able to, the kindness he still had trouble showing him. It was a very tiny piece, but it was better than nothing.

_The End_


End file.
